In the News : 37 year Old Woman Gives birth to 38 Children!!😱

A Ugandan Woman named Mariam Nabatanzi Babirye has the photo of herself, husband and some of her 38 Children splashed all over the pages of newspapers and social media.

As I stared at the photo of this “massive” family my jaws dropped open for a long while😱. Being a mother myself I can’t even begin to imagine having to go through birth pains 5 times not to talk of 38 times!! It is simply writing a suicide letter in my opinion. Expert says that having too many children increases a woman’s health risk

Mariam’s story is that she was given off in marriage at age 12 to a 40 year old man. A child abuse case, I mean I don’t understand the excuse that it Is because parents are ignorant that makes it easy to give away a child in marriage. This has to stop!

I believe it is only by sheer Providence that Mariam survived these births which were mostly probably delivered by a local midwife before she finally arrived at a hospital. Now the world knows her story. Haaaaa it is simply not a funny matter to me!!

By age 40 possibly the ware and tear of her body may soon start manifesting in form of one ailment or the other.

Medically the reason she has had multiple births is because she is hyper-ovulating. Meaning that she her ovaries releases multiple eggs monthly.
They say ignorance is costly and it is not an excuse. I can’t help but think about the what ifs of Maria’s case.
If only she and her husband had known better ; if only a family member or friend or neighbor had pointed her in the way of a permanent modern family planning method solution. Seriously somebody should have told her that her ovaries and even the uterus could be removed.

Anatomy – medicine. com

Somebody said the children didn’t look hungry or under nourished in the photo. Maybe because their father is a farmer? How big is his farm to be able to feed a family of 40 including making extra money to cloth and send them to school?

My what ifs returns… Seriously having too many children puts the mother, children and even the father at risk. High blood pressure from not having enough to care for them will set in.

Another angle to this is that government needs to better equip and strengthen primary health centers in villages and communities. It is my business; it is your business to save a mother and child.

Maternal deaths can be prevented through adequate health education and family planning.

Adebisi Adetunji (C)

Girls Living in “Face – me – I – Face – You” at Risk

“Face-me-I – Face – You” houses are overcrowded living quarters where occupants share bathrooms, kitchen and compound. It is not uncommon to see a family of ten share just one room. It is a community of constant fights and chaos. People who live in such a place are usually low income earners who struggle to make ends meet.

I remember we once lived in a face-me-I – Face- You compound while growing up. My father would insist that we do not go out of our house to play with children of other tenants in the compound. Instead we were kept busy reading our books and doing our little house chores. He then went a step further to purchase a betamax video cassette player and lots of cartoons to keep us busy. These we will stay glued to whenever our parents were not around.

One time I made the mistake of getting involved in settling fights between two children in the compound. I got the spanking of my life! Why because my dad did not want us to keep bad company plus I was supposed to be home already with my siblings after attending an evening coaching lesson. So you see it was getting dark and my poor dad didn’t know I was somewhere in the compound so he went in search of me at the lesson afraid something bad had happened to me. Hmmm… I will never forget the discipline I got.

Little did I know that my Dad was only trying to protect us from horrible things that could happen to girls like I and my siblings. I was under ten years and I had two other sisters as at that time. As soon as dad could afford it he got us an apartment with more privacy in safer environment.

Later I got to know about girls who were sexually abused by neighbors. Some of the perpetrators were young boys their age or male adults.

We were protected by our very vigilant parents who knew better. Unfortunately many parents of children who live in face-me – I – Face – You are so careless and some just don’t know the dangers lurking around to grab their daughters.

I have come across horrifying stories that I don’t want to even begin to talk about here. Everyday one girl is waylaid in her community and sexually abused. Most times it is one old man or silly boy in the compound/next door who abuse such vulnerable girls.

What is the way forward here? Why am I ranting? There is a serious need to educate parents at the grassroot level to pay more attention to the safety of their children.

Any practical suggestions of what we can all do? While at it please educate as many people you happen to meet in your community and neighborhood about this.

Girls need to be protected from sexual predators. It starts with you.

Adebisi Adetunji (C)

A Breathing Space for a Mother

Life is already tough for most women so there is need for a woman to really pay attention to her health and needs.

Often in market places and on the street I see a woman backing her baby with a heavy tray filled with wares she is hawking in the hot sun. The mother and baby suffer from the heat and are stressed out at the end of the day.

We met this woman carrying this big heavy Basin looking all worn out at the corner of a street in a community while on a house to house campaign on family planning with the Nigerian Reproductive Health Initiative team in Ibadan.  After chatting with her she was happy to quickly ask for a card that she would take to the family planning clinic to get a method done. Our brief enlightenment was like a rope of hope to pull her out of the troubled waters of having too many children.

I looked at her and wondered what her own unique struggles were? How many mouths she had to feed and how much she earned per day to care for her children. One obvious challenge was poverty.

Giving birth to too many children one cannot cater for will only continue the circle of poverty especially for many women.

Therefore it is our business to encourage that woman who cleans for us; that woman who sells petty things across the street; that woman who struggles with caring for her family. She needs to know how to stay healthy and stress free through the use of family planning. Then we will have less maids or cleaners with ten children that are denied the best things of life.

Save a mother, help a woman to have a richer and stress free life. Let’s help reduce the burdens we bare as women.

Adebisi Adetunji (C)

Achieving Success at Saving is Possible

If you live in a place where you have to provide water for yourself by digging a well or borehole then you must seriously have containers to save water in.

And if you depend on electricity to pump water into your tank and you live where power supply can go off for days…. Hmmm save some water for a rainy day😀

The other day we had one of those days without electricity supply and pumping water was out of the question. Usually at such times we make use of water reserved in big containers. As I scoped water with a bowl into a bucket it suddenly dawned on me that the water will finish soon. We usually fill the big container with like 7 to eight large size buckets. I realized that it is only the amount of water that we reserved that we are getting back. So we would get to use only the amount of water saved earlier… Nothing more… Nothing less.

If nothing is saved there will be nothing to draw from

It suddenly hit me, saving for a rainy day is important. I better start taking it more seriously. Of course I am trying to save through my office cooperative group and as well put some money away I the bank but I haven’t been as committed as l should.

The rainy day always look far or our mind play a trick on us that it will never come. My advice to myself and you my reader start saving more.

There will never enough money to save from but you still have to save. 

A few tricks on how to save some money away

* Make up your mind to save something from your pay check no matter how little you are earning.

* Sign a document that allows your bank to deduct the amount you intend to save directly from your salary account into a savings account that you can not withdraw money from for a stipulated period of time.

* Have a target/project or something you are saving for in mind.  It could be the education of your children or even your self, house project, a business project.  This will help you to be focus.

* Don’t have an ATM card for your savings account or else you will be tempted to withdraw money when in  need.

* Have a monthly budget and work within it.

* Have a plan and take steps towards having multiple source of income. Take advantage of your skills and talents. Do something else apart from your monthly pay work. This relieve’s you of having to work with a very tight budget that can really prevent you from saving.

* Remember little drops make an ocean.

Enjoy your week.
Adebisi Adetunji (C)

My Personal Easter Story… Childhood Memories

First let me wish you a Happy Easter!!

Ololade Adetunji’s Easter art work.

This morning I mused over my childhood’s thoughts about Easter. Did you ever thought that Jesus had to take a trip from heaven to die on the Cross every year?! 🐶

Favour Onoja’s Cross and Open tomb art work.

I actually used to be sad on Good Fridays… I felt terrible as a child that He had to go over this routine every year… Hmmm little did I know that it was a one time experience for him. My mum made it even scarier when we had to go through the ritual of not eating any animal whether fish or meat on Good Fridays. It was about honoring Christ by not eating anything with blood. 😀

Now I know that His trip to the Cross was a once and for all journey that accomplished the great purpose of showing God’s amazing love to me and everyone else.

Now I am so Glad that He is alive!!

Now He lives in my heart and not just on the pages of my Bible that I was advised to put under my pillow in those days … Reason to chase witches and wizards away. 😀😀😀

The journey of Jesus Christ to the Cross and back wins for me a great victory over all the powers of the enemy.

There is life, hope, mercy, love, a new beginning, freedom, joy in having Jesus in your heart.

Have a fabulous Easter!

Adebisi Adetunji (C)

How Suffering & Pain can become a Springboard for Great things – Corrie Ten Boom

In my tribe (Yoruba) we have a saying, Ibere Ogun la ri, a ki mo ipari e”. Literal translation – We only see the beginning of a war but no one knows how it will end. War brings with it so much misery, horror, pain, sorrow, and suffering. Therefore war is never good news.

This story happened during World War II which took place between 1st September 1939 and 2nd September 1945. It was a terrible long 6years battle that left many casualties of both dead and wounded. Many lost dear family members and loved ones carrying with their memories the horrors of that time. Many books on different accounts of experiences during the war have been written. While in Secondary School I first read one of such books, a biography of Corrie Ten Boom and her family’s horrible experience during World War II.

Her story left an indelible mark in my life and I must say it’s why I want to reach out to others and do some of the things I do now.

Corrie Ten Boom was born into a Dutch family who lived in Holland. The family was in the watch making business and they were Christians. Their happy family life was disrupted by events in the Second World War. It was during this time that the Nazi Holocaust took place. Jews were targeted and selected to be sent to concentration camps and killed at the gas chambers. Corrie’s family helped to hide many Jews in their home in order to protect them from these horrible mass murders.

Unfortunately, Corrie and her family were caught doing this act of kindness. They were arrested and sent to prison. Many of her family members died. Corrie and her older sister Betsie were sent to a political concentration camp. The horror they experienced at the camp was more than anything they ever imagined. But their faith in God kept them going. These women were made to do lots of hard work after which they held secret services using a Bible they had managed to sneak in.

They watched as women, children and men were sent to the gas chambers naked and life was choked out of them. Many were thrashed with whips naked. Later Betsie died leaving only Corrie behind. Before she died she left Corrie with these words, “There is no pit so deep that He (God) is not deeper still”.

I am reminded of the words of a hymn:
In the hollow of his hands
In the Hollow of his hands
I am saved whatever may betide me
In the hollow o his hands

Two weeks later Corrie was released just a few days to when women in her age group were to be sent to the gas chambers. The awesome ways of the Almighty God. Corrie’s story did not end with her past pain of sorrow and suffering instead she carried a new torch of life and hope to light every broken heart in her pathway.

Corrie after the war set up refugee houses in the Netherlands which became a rehabilitation center for concentration camp survivors. It also sheltered other jobless Dutch people. Corrie traveled the world sharing her story and wrote many books bringing the message of hope, over and salvation to many.
Corrie died on her 91st birthday in 1983. She is an example of how much suffering can become a ladder and springboard to doing great things.

God can use our pains and suffering to bring the best things in our lives just like Joseph in the Bible.

Today been Good Friday is known as the Passion of Christ by Christians. It is a time we remember His journey to the Cross, his pain, and deep suffering. We celebrate the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ every Easter. It was a difficult journey but it birthed the salvation of mankind from sin. This great sacrifice was done over two thousand years ago but the world continues to benefit from that great sacrifice.

Jesus Christ’s suffering brings healing, hope, and love to everyone who would open the door of his or her heart.

Sometimes we wonder ask ourselves why God allows painful things to happen. The question is this: what part did you and me as human beings play to bring that suffering or pain? A man gets drunk and goes off to kill an innocent victim on the road. We hate and are greedy; we want to control things and others and do not care by what means we get what we want. This hurts a lot of people. Our actions as humans destroy others and beautiful things around us. GOD is in the business of fixing us and situations. He extends his loving hands offering us hope and a better life as we allow him to take charge of things and lead us to the right path.

Do you know how to turn your suffering and pain into great blessings?

It starts with handing it all over to the one who knows your beginning and your end. Hand over the pains and the suffering to Jesus He is a great fixer. He knows how to bring beauty out of your ashes.

Just pray this simple prayer:
Dear Jesus, I come with my pains, suffering, and past hurts. I don’t know how to fix things again but I heard you can. I believe that your suffering on the cross was done to fix me and my situation. Come into my life and take over. In your holy name, I pray.

HAPPY EASTER…If you do need to share and talk to someone please send me a mail – bisimodupe1975@gmail.com

Photo Credits: The Hiding Place, Back Road Planet

Adebisi Adetunji(C)

The In-between of Our Lives

While surfing through and visiting blogs to read new posts I came by this interesting post by Folakemi – “Children as retirement Plan”.

Fola shares the story of an 85 year old woman whose children seem to have abandoned. She has 5 children who can not be found except for 2 sons who still won’t take her in. Thankfully the state government took her in. The gist is that this woman now 85years old is troublesome and so couldn’t live with anyone. She has had 5 husband’s none of whom are available or willing to take care of her.

This woman’s story got me thinking. Our attitude, character and choices will have an impact on our lives even at old age. I am not judging this old woman… I mean every one of us have a fair share of lives upside and downside.

I read the story of an old man who died leaving not so much in terms of silver and gold for his children but left a lot of integrity, honesty and kindness behind. His daughter was particularly mad with him for not been like other fathers who left great riches. She ended up landing an inclusive big package job with a company owned by someone whom her father had shown great kindness to when he was looking for a job. She is earning a 7 figure salary now.

The In-betweens of Our lives matter. What we do now will affect our tomorrow.

Adebisi Adetunji (C)