Protect their Innocence : Happy Children’s Day Nigeria

Every child deserves a quality life.
Every child needs a safe place to live in and grow.
Every child should be provided with good and nutritious food.

Every child has a right to education.
Every child deserves to enjoy his/her childhood. Don’t saddle them with responsibilities meant for adults.

Every child is a gift and precious.
Every child is a blessing to our world. You never know who is endowed with the gift that will make our world better.

Protect your child
Nurture him/her well
Train them with the right values

Build a home that is safe and loving for your child to grow in.

My heart goes out to the parents, families and friends of children who were involved in the Manchester bombing. No parent should have to go through that; no child should have their lives snuffed out like that. May you be comforted on all sides. May our world be a safer place.

Happy Children’s Day.

Adebisi Adetunji (C)

Forgetting to be Grateful, Forgetting to be Happy now – How You can be happy with your Life.

Today is Yesterday’s Answered prayer.

Many times we are focused on things we desire to have and haven’t been able to get/acquire.
Many times we focus on our dreams and goals and forget to be happy with the little/big successes we have had.

I find myself complaining about my workplace and desire to have something better. And so instead of being grateful I whine and whine and lose my joy. I forgot that yesterday I prayed to have this job and I got it. Today is yesterday’s answered prayer.

Sometimes we compare ourselves to what others have and forget that some other people wish to have what you have. Be happy with what you have and where you are as you hope and Trust God to give you a better tomorrow.

So you are single and feeling lonely? Worse still all your friends and nieces you took care of while growing up have gotten married. You are even helping to nurse their babies and sometimes tears drop and you wish you had yours; look around you there is so much to your life that you can be grateful for.

Your child is physically challenged and you struggle daily to take care of him/her. You wish yours was a “normal” child who can fend for himself. God knows about your struggles and He has been standing right there helping you by bringing people and resources to help that child. Be grateful, be happy and celebrate what you have for then you will see hope rising. There is always a higher and better purpose.

So your marriage is turbulent and possibly didn’t work out. Painful I know but be grateful; be happy for everything works out for good to them that believe even if it was your fault. Be happy, be grateful for a better tomorrow will happen for you.

How can I say it? I simply am grateful and choose to be joyful and I want you too, reading this to be.

Your happiness is not in getting that new dream job
Your happiness and joy are not in that relationship you so much crave.

Your happiness is not tomorrow
It is today, be Happy now.

Enjoy your everyday life (Joyce Meyer)

If you can’t enjoy your today; you might still not be happy tomorrow when your desires come true. It is about seeing today’s blessings even if they are small. Choose to celebrate today and all your blessings.

Change is coming and there will never be an end to what you want to achieve.

Today is Yesterday’s answered prayer.

Adebisi Adetunji (C)

Woman to Woman Talk #3 – If it is not a Diamond Ring then Nothing….

A girl graduates from college and sets her heart on settling down with the man of her dream. One should be clear about the kind of man one would like to marry. There is nothing wrong with writing down a few things about what you will like to see in the man you want to spend the rest of your life with. A typical list- A tall, handsome, six packs guy….hmmmn nice look! Then he has to have a Cadillac car, own his own business, and have a yacht and an airplane to fly you around the world in. Fantastic! Some girls are lucky to marry a prince or rich tycoon and there is nothing wrong with that. In fact, it’s a good dream …money will not be a problem! A friend said he prefers six digits to six packs… 😀 Lol

However, girl, there are other indices to consider when considering the kind of man you will like to settle down with. I met a few ladies who say that their man has to be rich before they can wear his ring. What happens if he spoils you with all the money in the world but does that to many other women in his life…you are only wearing the ring plus he is always never around flying across the world doing business.

I am wondering …who says you can’t be rich as a woman. Is there a law against that…certainly no? Do not measure the comfort you can have in life by what a man can offer you.

In the name of looking for a rich guy some ladies have passed off would be billionaires just because they are not looking like it right now.

What you need is an honest, God-fearing and Kind man whether he has money or not.

Work hard, have big dreams and you can be successful too. The right man who will appreciate, love and respect you will come your way.

Don’t sell yourself, short woman. A man’s character is not defined by the money in his pocket. 

Adebisi Adetunji (C)

Safe Motherhood #3: My Personal Eventful Birth Story Prt 1 – Before You Get pregnant

Lending my voice to creating awareness about Safe motherhood I will be doing a few posts on my personal eventful birth story and also share how women can have a safe journey through pregnancy and delivery by preparing ahead even while a single.

The beginning of my own story:

Whenever a couple decides to tie the knot or make a lifetime commitment in Marriage their families say prayers of fruitfulness for them. In Nigeria, you will hear parents and even their pastor offer prayers of twins and triplets if possible.

Often people prepare you for other aspects of marriage but no one talks to the couple about what to do when they are expecting a baby. No one would tell them how to manage the period of pregnancy. As a lady, my eating habits left much to be desired. Often I will only eat a little meal and then of course loads of junk food was the order of the day. I had no idea what this would later mean to my health.

When I got married to my beloved husband or Boo as is the trend now I was excited and happy. We were contented even though we both earned a meager salary. Our mothers will often call and ask how we were doing. By that, they meant, “are you pregnant yet?” My husband and I will laugh and tell them to keep praying and hopefully, soon they would be grandmas.

One day I started to feel dizzy and my stomach won’t just settle and the first thing I wanted to do was confirm if I was pregnant. We were advised thankfully not to take any drugs until we confirm with our doctor. You know newlyweds don’t know sometimes that when the woman is not feeling too good she might be pregnant. And so such a woman will assume it is a case of malaria or other mild illness and begin to take drugs that will end up harming her baby and herself.

The funny thing was that I went for a scan and didn’t go for the usual urine or blood test. There I saw my active baby swimming all around. I became excited and then the doctor conducting the scan said madam there is a little problem.

My heart sank. My doctor said my baby was growing with multiple fibroids around my uterus. I was scared but she allayed my fears that since it didn’t prevent me from getting pregnant my baby can still grow normally and be delivered safely.

And so the journey through pregnancy began. My first three months was unexpectedly not turbulent as I went about my normal business going to work and doing every other thing. Still, I wasn’t eating well neither did I register for antenatal care where I could have gotten the necessary information about kinds of rich foods for an expectant mother. Instead, I was eating things like cereal, cornflakes and no serious meals.

When my pregnancy clocked four months the battle began. I became very ill and couldn’t retain any food. You would expect that we would immediately go to the hospital but we were managing the whole situation at home. Our excuse was that we did not have money to go to a private hospital and the general government hospital was on strike.

I was barely eating for three months so it was not until 7 months into the pregnancy that I was able to feel well but my baby had not received the needed nutrition for his development in the womb. Finally, I was able to register for antenatal but rather late.

Wait until you hear about my traumatic delivery experience that almost cost the life of my baby and me in the next post about safe motherhood.

Lessons from My Story

  • Develop a good healthy eating habit now.
  • If you experience distress or fall ill during pregnancy do not stay at home, get to the hospital to see a doctor. A simple drip to help return body fluid I had lost while vomiting continuously could have helped to stabilize me. Also, my doctor would have prescribed something to stop the vomit.
  • Get medical help at a Primary Health center if you cannot afford the secondary or Tertiary government hospital. They are cheaper and almost free.

 

Before You Get Pregnant:

Now is the time to eat right as a single lady or as a couple who plans to have a baby. Your body needs to have all the necessary nutrients because in pregnancy you and your baby will need a double dose to be healthy.

Junk foods and sweets look juicy and feel tasty but they provide nothing useful to your body. Avoid them as they can increase your blood sugar level.

What to eat now that you are not pregnant:

  • Lots of fruits and vegetable – Carrots, Apple, Pineapple, Pawpaw, Water Melon, Ugwu leaf, Green(Efo tete) (Vegetables)
  • Dairy products such as milk, yogurt are rich in calcium
  • Foods rich in protein such as beans, fish, meat, egg. For Nigerians, if you do not really like beans, make akara and moimoi. These will still provide you with the much-needed protein.

Eat healthy to have a healthy baby. And seriously you need to be healthy yourself as a mother.

Know your health status before getting pregnant so that your health care provider can know how to properly manage you.

Adebisi Adetunji (C)

 

12 Factors that makes a Woman Susceptible to Obstetric Fistula, Prevention & Care (Safe Motherhood #2)

Mama sat at the bedside of her daughter looking dejected at the hospital. She prays hard that God will save her daughter from this affliction that left them all in open disgrace and embarrassment. Her daughter had just put to bed but her vagina was leaking with urine. The young lady had sustained an injury during a mismanaged childbirth and was later brought to the hospital. Mama is burdened with caring for her daughter and newborn as the girl’s husband had abandoned them. He couldn’t cope with the mess as he referred to it. Mama believed that somebody had bewitched her daughter but at the hospital, she finds out that there is hope for her daughter. She prays hard that the surgery to the injury will work but also worry about raising enough money to pay for it.
This young lady has what is known as Obstetrics Fistula which occurred during childbirth with unskilled birth attendants: A sad story but hopeful.

The international Fistula awareness day comes up every 23rd May and this year’s theme is tagged: Hope, Healing & Dignity to us All.

Obstetrics Fistula is an abnormal hole in the bladder or rectum as a result of a traumatic birth experience. Urine drains uncontrollably through that hole to the vagina. It can also be termed to mean injury sustained in difficult childbirth or a birth not properly attended to.
Fistula occurs mostly in younger people (under 18 years) not old enough to give birth.

Factors that makes someone susceptible to Obstetrics Fistula:
1. Children below age 18 getting pregnant are a risk as their birth canal is not big enough for a baby. The injury is usually sustained during childbirth.
2.  Labor that is not managed properly especially when there is an obstruction. This is a situation a baby is too big to pass through the birth canal.
3. When a woman presents a breech baby she can sustain an injury during delivery or in the process of trying to assist her.
4.  During the operation of a woman to remove her womb probably because of fibroid mistakes can occur and she sustains an injury.
5.  Unskilled birth attendants in the rural or urban area can put a pregnant woman at risk of Fistula injury.
6. Quacks carrying out a caesarean section can injure the bladder or vagina of a woman.
7. Cancer of the neck of the womb can also erode into the bladder leading to Fistula.
8.  Female Genital Mutilation (Female Circumcision) could cause injury to the bladder. Also, infections may occur in patients not given any antibiotic after FGM. This infection can erode into the bladder and vagina.
9. Women who in an attempt to treat Fibroid or abort through herbal means take caustic materials are at risk of sustaining an injury in their vagina and bladder leading to Fistula.
10.  In some cultural or family practices where women are not allowed to go to the hospital to give birth but instead are required to give birth at home with spiritual chants, when there is an obstruction such women are at risk of Fistula injury.
11.  Lack of funds/poverty prevents people from going to safe hospitals to give birth. Stillbirth may occur and in an attempt to deliver the mother of the baby an injury can occur.
12. In remote villages/places distance to the hospital denies women access to proper care and therefore are exposed to quacks to monitor their labor. This is dangerous.

Prevention of Fistula:
Integration of family planning to reduce the number of abortion by quacks helps to reduce fistula cases.
Training and updating midwives to be able to detect when there is going to be a problem with a pregnant woman’s delivery. Such women are referred on time to a hospital equipped to care for them.
Provision of Maternity Health centers in remote areas will enable women to have access to proper maternal care.
Preventing underage marriage
Sex and health education of teenage girls to keep them from engaging the services of quacks to do abortion.
Health education on the importance of pregnant women registering with hospitals for proper care.
Government making maternal care cheaper or even free.

Why Fistula should be eradicated
A leak of urine or faeces through the vagina leaves the woman psychological traumatized and physically incapacitated. She cannot go to work or go about her business for fear of the smell and stigmatization. Therefore she is economically handicapped. This will also affect the income of her family and her wellbeing.
Some women have been abandoned by their husbands because he could not cope with the trouble of his wife wetting the bed and smell. This further affects her well-being and that of the family.

The Good news is that Fistula is repairable. Many do not know that this is possible. Share with a woman with a Fistula today that her case is treatable.
Right now the University Teaching College Hospital and Adeoyo in Ibadan are offering free Fistula treatment. It is from 22nd May – 26th May 2017.

Fistula is Preventable; It is treatable

Apart from the opening story and conclusion, this article was drawn from points on an interview with a team from the Engendered Health (NGO) and members from Ministry of Health in Oyo state on the radio station Premier F.M 93.5 in Ibadan on the 23rd May 2017.


The team includes:
Prof. Oladosu Ojengbede – Chief Surgeon Obstetrics & gynecologist UCH.
Dr. Doyin Bello (Gynaecologist)
Mrs. Olajumoke Adekogba (Rep. Engendered Health – Fistula Care Plus (USAID)
Mrs. Oluwakemi Olawoyin( Rep. Commissioner for Health)

Adebisi Adetunji (C)

#World Cultural Diversity Day – Celebrating the Nigerian Way

Every 21st May has been set aside as world Cultural Diversity Day by the United Nations. 

Diversity brings variety it should be a strength. Someone may come from a different cultural background from you but you can both work together as a team and achieve great success. 

On my way to the Cultural center at Mokola in Ibadan for a program I met this cultural display train. I jumped out of  the vehicle I was in to take pictures.

So this how we celebrated the cultural day in Oyo State, Nigeria.

Drummers beating their drums during the cultural match at Mokola, Ibadan

 

Igbo Attaire
Ladies in Red Adire iro and baba Attaire.

 

Celebrate your cultural heritage and respect that of others. We are all unique and special in our own way. 

Adebisi Adetunji (C)

Why and How you need to Develop your Skills

I listened to a story about a computer graduate who went for a job interview and didn’t know how to use a computer…LMAO. Please, what exactly was he learning while doing this so called computer course?!!!

This case is both amusing and annoying. Why waste years studying a course and not have the practical skill needed to land a job with the certificate. No one is too old fashioned to learn something new or acquire a new skill. If an 80-year-old woman I met could say that she was learning how to use the social media and brushing up on her computer skills who says you cannot.

If you want to move from where you are to somewhere higher then you must develop your skills.
If you want to be more marketable and land that your dream job them you have got to improve on or acquire the needed skills for where you are aiming to get to.

How to/What you can do:
Take a course: Opportunities abound everywhere especially on-line. Surf the internet for useful things that will help develop you and put you on a better pedestal in your career.
Connect with someone who is doing what you want to do well. It is safer to learn from his/her wealth of experience than to struggle through what you are ill-equipped to handle.
Read…read and keep reading: Take time to look for books in your field or that skill you wish to acquire.
• And take the time to know yourself and what you want before wasting your time on a skill that you really don’t need. I know that “no knowledge is a waste”, but there is no point training to be a surgeon when all you want to do is be a fisherman.

So hey time to dust your bum, get up and go forward in acquiring a new skill.
Definition: Skill is an ability to do something well and keep improving at it.

Skills can be acquired all you need do is make yourself available to learn and grow.

Skills you can work on/develop:

  •  IT skills– learn how to use a computer beyond visiting your facebook, twitter, and Instagram pages. Know how to use Word, Excel and power point.
  • Communication skills: How are you communicating? Are you saying what you mean? Are your receivers getting what you mean? Are you communicating well with your customers to keep them and get new ones? Communication is key in any transaction with other human beings. Learn more about how to effectively communicate.
  • Management skills: If you want to become a manager then you really have to learn about management to be a successful one.
  • Teamwork: To work on big projects use will have to work with other people. Some people believe that they work better on their own. If you want to go far and achieve bigger things then you must learn about team work.

This is not an exhaustive list but we will keep talking about how you can develop and improve yourself in that chosen career or field. Have a great week and dream big!!

Adebisi Adetunji(C)