Woman to Woman Talk #9 – Four Reasons for Delay in Getting the Man of Your Dream and what you can Do

There is no prototype way or formula for getting hooked up to the right man to spend the rest of your life with. And there is also nothing wrong with sizing up the man that you want to share the rest of your life with. However it is possible to over- do things and what I want to talk about today bothers on attitudes that can end up chasing away eligible bachelors.

1. Some of us ladies have a caustic tongue and we are so quick to lash out at anyone who crosses our part. I want to paint a picture. Say you are the chief executive of a notable organization and an old male friend whom you grew up with is doing a menial job. You meet in church or a club group every now and then. Sometimes you get to chat with this male acquaintance and with the way he is hanging around you, you sense he has his eyes on you. In your heart, you are like don’t even go there, young man!! Why? Well for so many reasons such as his grammar is not as polished as you would like; he has no dress sense and he laughs too loudly for your comfort whenever you are having a group conversation plus he is not a six pack physically endowed kind of guy. So this “ungentle and ill- mannered guy asks you out on a date and then you go rolling your eyes giving him a peace of your mind. All you are trying to say is, “you look me well before you open your mouth”. Meaning look guy we are not on the same level!

And the young man is so embarrassed and has difficulty approaching any other lady for a long while. Please, sisters/ladies, be civil and polite when turning down a date or that I want to marry you kind of request. In my opinion, any man/guy who asks you out is paying you a compliment. It means you are desirable and wanted even if he is not your type in a quote. Then seriously put yourself in the shoes of the man in question.

Why does this matter? Because in your hurry to dismiss all the men who are not your type in a shabby way you might just miss THE ONE man who might just be the man that you dreamed of. I am not saying settle for just any man simply because you are looking for love and marriage but simply saying BE POLITE and KIND. One day it will pay off. Treat others the way you will like to be treated.

2.  Another thing I will like to add here is that if there is a man/guy whom you actually like or are interested in and he asks you out don’t keep him waiting for too long. Ok in my Christian circle a man proposes to you as we say and you go praying over whether to say yes for the next one or two years! Seriously you should know whether he is what you will settle for or not as quickly as possible and move on. We, women, tend to play the wooing game. It’s ok to want the man to sweat it for a while so you satisfy the need to feel very “pricy” but stop wasting your own time and that of the man. My advice once you know this is the man for you quit playing around and say YES before he moves on thinking that he has no chance with you. And then you go crying that he did not love you enough to wait.
My point ladies attitude matters. Also be simple and honest with yourself know what you want and say YES it doesn’t make you cheap!

3. If you are looking for a perfect man…there is no such thing as a perfect gentleman; that is overrated. What do I mean? Watch that perfect gentleman when he is watching a football game he loves or gets in a heated argument over something that upsets him…get the picture? You don’t need a perfect man but a good, honest, hardworking, God fearing man. Guess what? You are far from being perfect yourself.

So be down to earth, stop living in that fairy tale land.

4. Have you been badly hurt or disappointed by a past relationship or experience? This does not have to define your future happiness unless you allow it. Not all men are bad. There is still someone out there who will treat you right. Stop punishing yourself, open your heart and pray. Good love will find you again.

Adebisi Adetunji(C)

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4 thoughts on “Woman to Woman Talk #9 – Four Reasons for Delay in Getting the Man of Your Dream and what you can Do

  1. I love hearing the similarities of dating on the other side of the world. Do we put off marriage for fear of the extra chores that come with it? Haha. Great post.

    Liked by 1 person

    • The Extra chores make me cranky… But it must be done… Lol😀 Many times “the husband helps” but in his own convenient time. You can imagine o😂😂😂 But hey we pull through and the nice moments are when everyone in the family says mummy thank you. Thanks for taking the time to read.

      Like

  2. Excellent! I had a friend who did what you described. She had her eye set on a certain man. When another man asked her out she was so hateful to him. The guy she liked was standing right beside me and said to his friend, “I was thinking about asking her out but not now” So, her own actions ruined her plans. Who knows, if she had just been nice.

    Liked by 1 person

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