Woman – to – Woman Talk #15: Evening Dresses/Gowns in Market Places & Office?

There are dresses for the different occasion. Sometimes while driving around or taking a stroll I come upon a lady wearing what I call, “an evening gown” in broad daylight!! This kind of dress will make even fellow women who have a dress sense to turn and say haha…ki leleyi? (What is this?).

The most interesting part of it all is that the lady/woman in question will be feeling like on-top of the world. Haba! This scenario also shows up in the office space sometimes. How do you react to a colleague who shows up at work in a nice evening dress on Monday morning o?! Please, ladies, there are appropriate dresses meant for a different occasion.

Just because you saw your favorite actress on a television set wearing a particular kind of dress that you fell in love with doesn’t mean when you do get it, then you show up at work with it. Are you trying to make a statement? Well, you did but in a way, you didn’t intend.

I am not perfect in this dress sense thing but I do try my best to look good for an occasion appropriately. Ask if you don’t know.

So what I’m I saying here? Wear appropriate clothes to appropriate places o before you start to look like a clown. Ask and keep asking if you don’t know. Google has made it easy just type in, “clothes for the office”; “clothes for when going to the market”; “clothes for exercising”, “clothes for a Gala night” etc.

Cheers enjoy your weekend!!

Photo Credit : Pink Queen  – In case you are looking for lovely evening gowns.

Adebisi Adetunji (C)

Dear Parents were you always First in School? Submit your Report Card to Me!! 😀😂Do Something Different to Help Your Child.

Students at the speeches & Sounds schools competition.

Trust us, Nigerian parents, some of us would say something like this after a Prize Giving Day ceremony:

Parent: Romoke, does John have two heads?
Child: No daddy
Parent: If so, why is he the one getting all the prize?!
Child: But Daddy…
Parent: Don’t daddy me in my days I always came first in class (LMAO)

Most parents would not readily admit to the fact that they had challenges passing exams or scoring a good mark while earlier in their school days. Mostly we want our children to get good grades, in fact, get straight A’s in all subjects. And when you attend the end of year prize giving day you cringe on your seat when you see a particular girl/boy being called forward to receive the first prize for taking the first position in about 6 subjects including maths and English. Then you take a peep at your child wishing he/she is the one being accorded such honor that you would have made you a proud parent of a very brilliant child! Hey, nothing wrong with wanting your child to do well and excel in his/her academics. BUT…

Please, dear dad/mum submit your school report sheet and let’s see if you actually came first or you were just an average student or even the last!!

Stop comparing your child with his/her siblings or other people’s children. Every child has his/her strength.

Some children are good at analytical thinking and would do very well with calculations while some are story tellers who will do well in social sciences. Some others are simply creative and would do well in the arts. Build on the strength of your child.
Now that schools are on holidays and we are preparing to resume another school year, help your child do better.

DOs & DON’Ts
Stop speaking down on your child. He/she is not olodo(dullard). Say positive things to your child and tell him/her that they can do better.
Look through his/her report sheet. It will give you an idea of his/her strength and where they need help. Stop looking at your child’s position in class instead look at how scores of subjects can be improved.
Don’t give up on your child; believe that he/she has a bright future. Somebody believed in you in the past and that is why you are where you are today. It could have been a teacher or your parents.
If your child is going to SS1 where students are sent to arts, science or commercially oriented classes please do not insist on him/her being in Science class when that child’s strength lies in the art or commercial class.
Don’t be deceived, just because your child scores high in all the subjects (arts & science) then you push him/her to follow in your footsteps. Study your child’s skills, talents, and interests and encourage him/her along that line.
If a school is not right for your child, change it. Your child doesn’t have to go to the school all your friend’s children went or are enrolled in.

Help for Children with learning disability/difficulties/Slow learners: In case your child has challenges with learning, for example, he/she keeps failing almost all subjects and it is a recurrent thing then you need help. Do not be ashamed to seek professional advice, help, and support for your child.

Here two service providers that can help:
1) Taiwo Adeyanju Center : Offering services in assessing, counseling and therapy for Children with special needs such as learning disabilities/difficulties. Helps to promote social, mental, education and vocational well-being of children.

Website : https://adeyanjutaiwocentre.org.ng/
Phone Number : 08065798289, 07081431994,
Address: 10 Lala Avenue, Off Adenuga Street Bodija, Ibadan, Oyo State.

2) Diamond Psychological Consult & Services : Offers services in a) psychological assement of a child/persons intelligence (IQ test), language skills, personality. b) Therapy and counselling

Contact:

Phone no: 08079905834, 08128276962

Address: No 2, Sonel Bonei Way, Salami Estate Rd, New Bodija, Ibadan, Oyo state.

Email – info@diamondmoor.com.ng

Twitter: @moordiamond

Adebisi Adetunji(C)

#SAFE MOTHERHOOD – Do You Know that Parts of a baby Forms 3 weeks after Conception? How to Have a Healthy Baby.

Your baby’s development and growth starts in the womb and not just after birth. Most times we begin to count a child’s age when he/she is born. I’d like to think that the nine months in the womb should be added. Yes, the life of any child begins at conception. It is therefore important that a woman understands that once she gets pregnant everything and anything she does can affect the development of her child.

As early as three weeks after conception occurs a baby’s organs internally and physically begins to form (head, hand, fingers, intestine, heart etc.) So it is very important for a mother to start eating right and taking care of herself right from the time she is aware that another life is growing in her. I would say even before you get pregnant eat right, eat a balanced diet and feed well. Then your body can have enough supply of nutrients, vitamins, minerals needed by you and your baby.

What you eat; how you take care of yourself and health during pregnancy matters.

Foods rich in nutrient to help your baby develop well in the womb:

  • Eat a lot of proteinous foods such as egg, fish, meat, beans, Moimoi, Akara(Bean Cake) – Helps your baby’s brain and muscle development.
    Specifically Beans – contains Zinc an important mineral that helps to give your baby adequate birth weight and cut down the risk of having a pre-term baby.
  • Fruits (Orange, banana, Apple, grapes, Guava, etc.) contain lots of vitamins.
  • Dairy products such as milk, yogurt – This is rich in calcium necessary for the development of your baby’s bones, teeth.
  • Foods rich in fiber such as oatmeal, cereals rich in wheat – This class of food contain vitamins and proteins.
  • Vegetables such as carrot, cabbage, efo tete, ugwu leaf and so much more – These are rich in vitamins and minerals.
  • Water is essential in helping organs of the body to function properly. Water aids digestion, circulation of nutrients in the body and oxygen flow in the body. Therefore water is very important in pregnancy. Take a lot of water in pregnancy.

Most malformation (birth defects) occur when the organs are forming and what can cause this include effects of drugs used without doctor’s prescription or exposure to radiation. 

Beware Alcohol, smoking and taking drugs without a doctor’s prescription can have serious implication on your baby.

Warning Alcohol affects the development and health of a baby in the womb and after birth.

Photo Credit: BBC

Adebisi Adetunji (C)

Woman to Woman Talk #14 – Beware when taking a Taxi – Where to Get Help For Rape Victims #Nigeria

A dear girl shared her story about a horrible experience after boarding a taxi. I will call her Bimbo. On this fateful day, Bimbo arrives town on a visit to see a few friends. It was evening and she was in a hurry to pick a taxi to get her to her destination before it gets dark.

A cab stopped right by her and she quickly scanned to be sure the passengers were not all men as that connotes that it might not be safe to board. Luckily there was a woman in the taxi so Bimbo was at ease boarding it. A few minutes after they took off the driver went in a direction that raised her danger alarm bells. It turned out that the driver and passengers were intent on robbing her. If they had only robbed her Bimbo would have only had to count her losses in terms of money. In fact, when these cab thieves did not find enough money on Bimbo they collected her ATM and withdrew all that was left in her account. The most disheartening thing was that the male passengers even raped her while a fellow woman watched!!! Bimbo was robbed of her possession and her body. She cursed these passengers which included men a woman.

When it comes to RAPE Silence is not Golden.

 

I asked Bimbo whether she reported this matter to anyone. She refused to tell anyone that she was raped except when she and I had a chat recently. Bimbo was too ashamed. She visited a clinic to take care of any pregnancy that could occur as a result of the rape but what about the emotional and psychological wounds. Bimbo was too ashamed to tell anyone and my heart really goes out to her. I was really disturbed and mad about what happened to Bimbo. She will need to be helped to overcome any trauma still lurking in her heart.

How can you protect yourself from being robbed or raped when taking a taxi?

  • There are parking garages for taxis going to any part of the town. Usually, taxis line up in a queue waiting to get a full number of passengers before taking off to their destinations. Most times you and I are not willing to wait patiently for the taxi/cab to get filled and so we pick what is known as soole in Yoruba that is taxis who are on the move by the road side. So you jump in not knowing whether they are robbers or rapists even! Please be careful
  • Get out of your home or office early enough and pick a taxi at the motor park instead of taking just anyone you see on the road.
  • Avoid late night waka waka o

Help For Rape Victims

I present to you an organization with a vision to create a society where women, men, and children are free from rape and sexual violence:

STAND TO END RAPE INITIATIVE

I am Standing to End Rape: Join Me & Others

Their services include but not limited to:
• Peer mentoring for rape survivors
• Therapeutic sessions with healthcare professionals
• Counseling, support, and treatment

Contact Information:
S.T.E.R Initiative
No 1A, Kola Adeyina Close, Lekki Phase 1
Mobile: +2348095967000
Email: contactus@standtoendrape.org
standtoendrape@gmail.com

S.T.E.R Initiative work on cases in various states in Nigeria, simply reache out to the team.

Remember don’t be silent, speak up and help to end rape
Speaking up means you get help as a rape victim survivor.

Please be safe; stay safe
Adebisi Adetunji ©

What is your Take? Is a Man in Trouble when his wife Earns more or is the Bread Winner?

In this short video I shared a bit from an issue that came up while discussing with a few male colleagues at work. And the question is about whether a woman treats her man as a footmat when she earns more or has to support the family when he is out of job for whatever reason. Share your thoughts after listening. It will take you just about 4minutes. This debate gets interesting! Adebisi Adetunji (C)

Tuesday Musing: Stop Neglecting Yourself ;Take Care of You

It is easy to fix everything and everyone but yourself.

Remember to take time to relax.
Watch that fatigue; that tired and exhausting feeling.
Stop eating junk because you are too busy trying to meet deadlines.
If you break down life doesn’t stop because of you. So stop and take care of yourself.

How to take care of yourself

  • Eat right
  • Delegate duties/assignments
  • Go play golf, tennis or watch a movie if you like the work load can wait.
  • Rest and yes sleep is good and necessary to be able to perform optimally at your tasks.
  • CEO time to take a break; your company will not crash before you get back.
  • Spend quality fun time with family, friends and loved ones.

Build meaningful relationships now because that is all that will be important a few years from now.  

People slum and die often this days don’t add to the statistics.

Take care of yourself. 😀😀

Adebisi Adetunji (C)

Today…

Keep dreaming never give up. And hey… Don’t close your eyes😀. A beautiful piece by Jacqueline the word Smith. This girl keeps going higher… Please check out her newest book, “Unbridled’ on Amazon.
Never give up on your dreams!

a cooking pot and twisted tales

Today, I’ll dream with eyes open, so that I’ll see where life will take me and appreciate the steps.

Today, Dream, Aspirations, Inspiration, Life, Quotes,

Check out my latest book ‘Unbridled.’

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