Stop! Don’t End it All…Winning Against Depression…It is Possible

Something mind boggling has been happening: in the past few days, the news reported about four different attempts by four individuals to commit suicide. There are many hypotheses about what could have made these individuals to end their lives ranging from failure of exam perhaps for the student victim; business gone sour, loss of money, depression to even the idea of blaming witches for hypnotizing them. Whatever the reasons are no human being should end it that way…Life is precious and is a gift.

Depression is usually triggered by an unexpected life crisis/event. It affects the mood, thoughts, and activities.

It is said that more women are likely to experience depression than women. Partly responsible is women’s biological experiences with menstruation cycle, pregnancy, menopause and more.  There is need to understand what depression is; its signs and symptoms in order to be able to deal with it. I am not medical personal but as a human being and social worker, I want to speak from my heart that it is possible to win the battle over depression.
So before defining what depression is; its signs and symptoms and how to get the help I want to start with words of hope:

You can handle Depression
 Understand that you are not alone in this challenge. There are people who are going through the same things you are going through. With the right treatment, they are coping and living normal lives. Many have overcome their depression.

Whatever you are going through is for a season. You can come through even stronger and better.

When one door closes always remember that another will open

If you are depressed because you are in debt hey it is not the end of the world. Understand that you can get out of that debt and you will as you take things one day at a time. Look for options and ways you can begin to reasonable pay back at your pace.

If your partner or spouse cheated on you, it is not the end of the world and it is not your fault. It is he/she’s loss. Your life matters not because he or she is in it but because you are worth loving, so love yourself and move on.

If you are battling with a long term illness, remember today is another day that you are alive. Concentrate on happy thoughts and moments in your life and know that you are strong and can come through.

Don’t follow through with that suicide thought. You are important, you are loved, and there is so much more you can achieve with your life. Suicide is an attempt to end one’s life. Suicide is an attempt to end one’s life. Your life matters!!

So let’s get down to what Depression is, signs/symptoms:

Depression is a downward feeling that drags on for a very long time.
A feeling of loneliness, worthlessness.
A state of giving up hope.
A state of being that believes the worst has happened and cannot be remedied.
A feeling that can trigger withdrawal from normal activities.
A feeling that wants to shut out help from others.
A feeling of hopelessness.
A feeling that says you don’t really matter anymore, give up.
Thoughts of wanting to hurt yourself.
Thoughts of death and suicide.

Causes of Depression:
• Loss of a job
• Loss of a loved one
• Failing an exam as a student
• Bankruptcy
• Lack of money
• Serious medical condition

How to get help if you are depressed
• Visit and speak with your family doctor.
• Talk to someone about your issues or what you are feeling ( Friend, spouse, parent, teacher) Anyone you trust.
• Speak to a counselor or social worker
• Talk to your pastor or religious leader
• Engage in interesting and relaxing activities such as sports, going to the cinema in the company of friends, attending parties( weddings, birthdays, house warming etc) like in Nigeria we like partying.
• See your psychologist or Psychiatrist ( it doesn’t mean that you are mentally incapable as culture tends to stigmatize such persons in some places).

Whatever you do fight this thing call depression, you can do it!

Photo Credit: Pinterest.com

NOTE: If you need someone to share your thoughts with…reach me via my email…bisimodupe1975@gmail.com. Together we can support each other. Loads of love from my heart.

Adebisi Adetunji(C)

Anorexic at Fifteen- A Girl’s Story

There are a number of things that can negatively scar/impact a person for life. For some a childhood experience is responsible for their problematic low self-esteem.

Words are seriously powerful. A Yoruba adage says, “eyin lo hun. To ba ti bo sile, kose ko mo”. It means that words are fragile, once spoken cannot be retrieved especially when it is hurtful or damaging.

As a parent what words are you speaking to your children?
As a teacher you are a major player in how your students turn out in future. Many of us believed our teachers possibly more than our parents as toddlers…So as a teacher are you speaking words that build the self-esteem of kids under you?

Check out this story from a book I am reading currently: Handbook on Counselling Youth by Josh McDowell & Bob Hostetler. Chapter 42- Anorexia Nervosa
Anorexia Nervosa is an eating disorder anorexia-3

Ever since she was a baby, Linda had been fat. Her parents used to call her their little teddy bear because she was cuddly and pudgy…months before Linda first sought treatment, she tried cheerleader…When the big day of tryouts came , she performed perfectly. Everyone thought she would be selected.
The next morning she left for school, excited as she anticipated seeing her name on the list of new rally squad members. Then came the shocking truth, her name was not on the list. She couldn’t believe it. What had gone wrong?
Linda ran down the hall to find the cheer leading adviser. Mrs Anderson stood up as Linda walked into her office in tears. “Why didn’t I make the squad when everyone, including you, said I was so good?” Linda cried.
Mrs Anderson’s frank reply made a scarring impression on Linda. “You’re good,” she said, “but you’re also overweight. We can’t put fat cheerleaders out in front of everyone. Besides that, we don’t have a uniform big enough to fit you”.
Linda hated herself, she hated her fat…Two months later, Linda had lost forty pounds and had gone from a size thirteen to a size four. She had become anorexic at fifteen years of age.

I find this story very sad because that cheer leading opportunity was just one big step in helping Linda become confident about herself. Words are powerful be careful what you say to others especially children and teenagers. Be kind, be patient and don’t just be frank in a hurtful way.

You have an opportunity to help your child as a mum or dad believe in himself/herself.

You have the opportunity as a teacher, leader to help produce kids that are confident about themselves.

According to Josh McDowell & Bob Hostetler in their Handbook, Youth Counseling:

A few causes of Anorexia
• Childhood abuse…it is an escape route for pain
• Culture of been slim and thin as an acceptable figure accepted by society.
• Need for control.

Look at the enormous effects
• Amenorrhea- It sometimes causes disruption of normal circle.
• Anemia – decrease in red blood cell count in the body.
• Malnutrition
• Kidney dysfunction and failure – Extreme loss of weight can cause the kidney to malfunction.
• Dry skin & thin head hair.
• Guilt & Shame
• Social withdrawal

If you have an eating disorder problem please seek help. You’ve got beautiful things ahead of you. You are unique and special. Your past does not have to determine your present, there is a whole lot more to you. And seriously you are beautiful just been you; there is nothing wrong with having some more flesh!!!

Photo Credit: ODDEE -Ten most shocking cases of Anorexia

Adebisi Adetunji(C)

When do you Recharge yourself?

While surfing and reading through my wordpress reader page to catch up on new post by friends in the blogging community i came across this post Recharge by Nomadic Adventurer.  An interesting and inspiring read.

It was a reminder that you and I need to take care of  ourselves. Just because you seem to  have a lot of energy to expend does not mean that you are invincible to breaking down.

So the idea is this don’t wait to have a nervous break down before you take that much needed rest.

It is ok to give time to supporting family, friends and colleagues in their projects.

It is ok to celebrate with friends and family

It is ok to do one more task for your company or organization

But when your body begins to give that warning sign of, “i am tired; “i am exhausted”. Then it is time to give your body a break before it decides to make you rest by force. This is not usually an enjoyable rest.

know when to STOP and take time to REST

Post inspired by Daily Prompt