Humour: Two Determined Waring Goats #getittogetherng

There  I was in this neighborhood on a community awareness trip on Family Planning gathering information and then came this drama. While speaking to a tailor and his wife  who is nursing a baby here were these two baby goats trying out the strength of their young heads.

They stood facing each fiercely like they were competing for something for a few seconds. Then they will move towards each other like a slow motion in a movie and knocked each other’s head together as hard as they could. They did thus over and over again.

We were really amused.

My team and I made various comments. And I said its like these goats have a full stomach so they are trying to expend their energies. Like little children when hunger sets in they will go looking for their mother for some breast milk and possibly food waist from dustbins in the neighborhood. And the fight continued!! 😂 we watched laughing and I took photos of the two waring goats… But they were not even scared of me nor my camera… Hahaha

Like these two determined goats couples need to make an informed choice and take steps towards planning for the future of their families.

Children will play and make demands of their needs from parents so plan for the number you can adequately cater for. 

Adebisi Adetunji (C)

Dear Diary…Emotionally disturbed…TBEE Writes #10

 

I tried so hard to meet the Monday edition of this post but couldn’t…So sorry if you have been following the story of TBEE…Here it is now…Thank you for following.

Dear Diary features on this blog Mondays & Wednesdays

 

jotterThe drama in the early hours of this morning left me shaken. My thought was disoriented as I lay in my bed staring at my pink and blue flowery wall. My beautiful wallpaper which always brought a smile to my face didn’t have the power to do that at the moment.

I was really upset and sad that my dad had caught me right in the arms of my boyfriend DT while walking like two love beds in my tightly fitted mini dress. I was supposed to be in my room in the hostel, sleeping or at least awake cleaning at 6 a.m. on a Saturday like other girls. The disappointed and pained look on my father’s face kept coming back like pictures from a movie scene.

Dear Diary I expected Dad to raise his voice and give me a good lecture about how he had raised me up as a good Christian girl. At home when we misbehaved we usually got lessons from scriptures in the Holy Bible. God help you…if dad was in a good mood you will only have to recite like… ten verses of scriptures if not you are going to write down and memorize like twenty Bible verses. By the time you are done you would have preferred a good spanking to the rigor. It always left you sober but this made us learn verses in advance for the day of “discipline”.

But this morning my dad was different…his eyes said I raised you better than this. As soon as DT sneaked away, I stood there in front of dad expecting the backlash but instead, there was dead silence. Although one or two cars drove past us it felt like we were the only two people standing in the world. Father and daughter stood there facing each other. My head was bowed down in embarrassment but when no words came from my father I had to lift my head to look at him…my eyes were pleading with him to understand that I was young and just wanted to have some fun.

My father made a U-Turn, opened the car door, hopped in  and drove off without looking at me. I stood there in the cold watching as his car sped off leaving a big gap between us. I felt a lump in my throat and wanted to cry but the tears won’t come. I gathered the little strength I had left and forced my feet to move towards my hostel. Exhausted from the all night dancing and emotional drain of meeting dad in the parking lot I slammed myself on my made bed.

You see I love my dad and really didn’t want him to misunderstand me. “I am not a prodigal daughter”…I said aloud to myself. Then the tears flowed down my face. I had a good cry and was not happy. Throughout the day I refused to do my usual Saturday cleaning. I just didn’t have the strength to do it. DT did call to find out how things turned out between me and Dad. I mumbled a few senseless words and he said he’ll come over to check on me later. Now how am I going to settle this mess? An idea came…Yes

Moms always know what to do. When I called mom she had all the details from my dad already. She had just four words for me…”I am coming over”. She sounded even more disturbed than I was. They say a well-behaved child belongs to the father but a bad one is the mother’s headache. Is mom having a headache because of me? Who knows what Dad might have said to her.

Okay, I am bracing myself for the meeting at least I’ll get to explain my side of the story and get her to placate dad. Still waiting for Mum but I have managed to clean up and eat a little food. I better warn DT not to come see me today, I don’t want him and mom to meet o…that would be another saga!

Dear Diary writing this down sort of really calmed me. Now all I have to do is wait.

Adebisi Adetunji (C)

BEND DOWN BOUTIQUE CLOTHES STILL TRENDING – Are you Wearing One Right Now? *Wink*

bend-down-boutiqueHow many of us did patronize a bend down boutique…hahaha… caught you there. I did and some of those clothes are as good as brand new as we say… “Grade A”. That means clothes still with their label tags from overseas of course.

I remember going very early with my mother to the bend down boutique market while still growing up. We would wake up very early and be in the market as early as 7 a.m. My mother knew how to get the Grade A clothes. She will get a good number for us and plan to sell the others to those who would buy from her later.

When we get home we would wash our Grade A dresses, sun dry them then Iron to leave nice line “gaiters”. Hehehe …who would know that they were “Bend down boutique dresses”?

Some people while admiring our dresses would say, “hey, your dress is so beautiful, you must take me to where you bought them”. The next question will be, “how much did you buy it”? No way would I tell them that it cost N300…! Yes o, the gist is that I will mention a real boutiques shop’s price back then N3000 -Three thousand Naira…! And it is always from USA, UK, and Dubai brand…hehehe who is deceiving who?

No wahala, so long as we got to look nice in our bend down boutique dress who cares!

If you can’t afford expensive boutique clothes hey, wear your bend down jare and look prim and proper. Afterall no one need know.
Enjoy your Friday!!

Bend Down Boutique: Affordable Fairly used or factory condemned clothes. They are clothes spread on a mat or packed in bags for people to take their pick and buy from.

Adebisi Adetunji (C)

Funny & Weird things I heard today

img_20170118_062735I was watching a sitcom titled Dogood. A restaurant.. Lady servers where on strike because the work load was too much. On return here is one of their condition for continuing to work : “We must Collide to do the work”.
How will you they get anything done if they collide… 😎😎
And they want to be entitled to three square meal per day with “2 Triangle meat on top of their food!🐙.

A TV comedy Show : A customer ordered : I want cow leg –
Waiter: Does my leg look like cow leg…? 😒😒

In a court… Woman says the court should allow her rape her violator back to get justice!!?

On Facebook a friend joked about a new dangerous snake that had just been discovered. Nothing can kill it except it bites itself… Guess what?! It is the snake in your Nokia phone!! 🐶🐶😂

Cheers!

Adebisi Adetunji (C)

Daring to get into an oversized Shoe

 

img-20161005-wa0000

She looked at her mummy on heels and giggled. Her little mind said:

“This mummy’s shoes makes such nice sound …”ko,ko, ka”. I must wear them”.

It was play time and there was mummy’s shoes sitting comfortably on the shoe rack. Giggling and laughing she raises her little hands and down came the shoes thudding on the ground. Her little feet enters the shoes…

“Yeeeh at last, i am wearing mummy’s shoes”!!!

Mummy seeing her little girl in her shoes shock her head smiling and saying to herself:

“The young shall grow”.

Do you remember your play time as a child? I did try both my dad and my mum’s shoes on my little feet. Imagine trying to walk in them…hee…hee. Yes…i stumbled and fell a few times but my little mind said i am winning this battle of fitting into an oversized shoe! 🙂

Leadership and Responsibilities: Sometimes you have to wear an oversized shoes. Like a little child you might stumble and fall but don’t give up. Soon your feet will fit the shoes.

This post was inspired by Daily Prompt: Daring

Adebisi Adetunji(C)

Guest Post: Dear woman, life is simple.

I was laughing all the way reading this post…Something to relax you and encourage you to make your life simpler…no need to complicate things…just breath. Enjoy reading… How to uncomplicate your Life.   UNCOMPLICATE
Another Great Post from Oyinkansola Peter- Ajayi

On too many occasions, my friends and I have chided one another for complicating life. I bet that sounds complicated already. Lol. But really, I don’t think life is as complex as we all make it seem.

Say you step into a salad bar to place an order for chicken salad. A.plate.of.chicken.salad. And you go like; “Can I have a plate of extra chilli, warm water rinsed cabbage, seeded green pepper, diced fresh carrot, boneless chicken wings salad!” What?! Why didn’t you just make it yourself if you knew the recipe so well. Just eat what you are served already!

I am always the first to ask for the best of anything. That’s because I place a premium on quality. When you have the spirit of excellence you naturally seek out top notch products and services. You intentionally make friends with individuals who reason like you or better than you. You strive and stretch yourself to be the best version of you. However, I am wise enough to know that sometimes, asking your hairstylist for sterling service delivery is asking for too much. Sometimes, expecting the best in certain situation is like asking for the impossible. Apparently you can’t give what you don’t have. So make excuses for people. Cut people some slack.

Are you still contemplating saying “HI!” to the cute guy that works in the same building as you? Admit it you like smart and confident guys. Didn’t you just over hear him analyze the NGF crises intelligently with his colleagues at the cafeteria? You weren’t eavesdropping just that you like mind stimulating conversations and you heard that. Next time you “bump into” him on the staircase, compliment his tie. You just said hi and it is okay to be the first to say hi.

Gifts are to be appreciated. The next time a friend buys you a rather tasteless and cheap fabric receive it with love. We know you wear designer and you are a power dresser but it won’t hurt to make a simple kaftan with the fabric. On your next visit to the abattoir or fish shop, pull it out! Your designer won’t be appropriate for such outing anyway.

It is okay to let things slide, demand less of situations or people who can’t give you the more or extra you so much desire. Ignore the waiter who didn’t address you as “Your Royal Highness.” If only he knew your great-grand father’s Uncle was the Oba of Benin. That is it! *sighs* He doesn’t know but we know so don’t embarrass us by trying to let him know because he doesn’t have to know, let it go!

A commercial bus attendant, yes the one with ripped Chelsea jersey, grease stained knicker and fungi infected nails. In his bid to curse the other motorist vying for the good portion of the road with his “Oga*” mistakenly spits in your face. Now you can even tell he had Chelsea dry gin as beverage for breakfast. I know you are angry and really, he deserves to be told off for opening his mouth carelessly. Just give him the eye and seal your lips. He is not worth the trouble. I appreciate his loyalty though. Awon ti Chelsea! Lol.

Just let the dumb in your class win the argument. Don’t let someone drag you into an absurd and pointless argument. We all know the Capital of America is Washington D.C. But he insists it is New York. In fact, he was there when the founding fathers were mapping out the country. You know he is senile so smile and give him a dismissive nod.

Crying after seeing a good movie is not a sign of weakness, if at all I’m told to explain it -it only humanizes you. God gave you tear ducts for a reason so quit being a “pseudo-macho”

It is okay to laugh out loud with your friends at the mall. It is okay to talk about Jesus on Facebook. It is okay to give your babe a big bear hug at the motor park regardless of who is watching. It is okay to help that senior citizen cross the road. It is okay not to have premarital sex even if the Pope says it is “cool.” It is okay to say I don’t know when you really don’t know, nobody knows it all. It is okay to be tagged geek, nerd because you are studious. Someday you’ll be tagged Nobel Prize winner, keep at it.

Many times we let people’s expectation and fear of being labeled get in the way of being true to ourselves. And rather than just being us we complicate our lives. But like India Arie said in her song “Wings of forgiveness”
“…the art of simplicity simply means making peace of your complexity” Dear woman, life is simple; don’t complicate it. It’s okay to smile after reading this!

oyinkan FMBThis post was written by Oyinkansola Peter-Ajayi.                       
Oyinkan is a Correspondent and Presenter with Radio Nigeria.
She lives by the mantra, “Eagles don’t flock” and tweets @Oyinpeter_ajayi

Photo Credit: Medium.com

Word Glossary:

kaftan – Men’s long gown worn over a trouser

Oba of Benin – King of Benin Kingdom, Nigeria.

Oga – His Boss

Awon ti Chelsea – Chelsea Fans

 

Funny Difference between Mums and Dads

FUNNY PHOTOWhen it comes to buying foodstuff

Dad: Honey i am home and guess what?!
Mum: What?
Dad: I stopped by at the market to get a few things.
Mum: Great…so what dd you buy?
Dad: N3000 worth of meat and N2,000 Fish
Mum: N5000 for only Meat and fish….and we need other things like salt, Groundnut oil, seasoning, Iron sponge for washing pots; Foam for wiping the sink, …
Dad: (Cuts in)ok…ok next time you go shopping you can buy them.
Mum: (Not pleased)

Breakfast on a school day
Mum: Darling we need to buy a few things for breakfast tomorrow.
Dad: I think we still have beverage and milk
Mum: But we need to buy bread, Jam/butter and egg.
Dad: Look the children will manage tea and biscuits.

In the morning:
Dad: Honey we are running late; What is for breakfast?
Mum: Tea and Biscuit
Dad: Isn’t there any bread and butter that we can toast???

Daddy’s Car:
Children: We are hungry dad, can we eat some of the meat pie you bought for us?
Dad: (Shaking his head) No…no…no when you get down from the car you’ll eat.
Children: But Dad…
Dad: (Cuts in)Don’t daddy me…i won’t have you messing up my carpet and chair after my laborious washing of the car in the morning.
Children: ( Grumbling)

Mummy’s Car:
Children: Mummy can we eat our biscuits, groundnuts and soft drinks.
Mum: Go right ahead.
Children: Don’t worry we will be careful not to dirty your car.
Mum: Go on guys, how else would people know i have kids!!!

Holiday/Weekend:
Children: We are hungry
Dad: Again…didn’t you just finish eating something a while ago?!!
Mum: Oh honey, let them eat…after all its a holiday and since they are not busy doing school work…they will be doing a lot of eating.
Dad: (Shakes his head) I just don’t understand…this children, please don’t finish all the foodstuff in the house o.
Mum: God will continue to provide honey.
Dad: I hear you…

Adebisi Adetunji (C)