Friday Musings : Tips for Making Progress

At an FGMC workshop organized by YoungMen Against Sexual & gender based violence.

Life is a teacher and everyday each one of us is presented with an opportunity to learn. How we choose to handle our jobs, family, business, career and the pursuit of our dreams can eventually make or mar our progress.

Perhaps the thought line should be about “the how” you make progress. A few tips:

1. Give your best and go that extra mile – when we give our best and do more, someone that matters is observing. It is likely that you get even bigger opportunities that will improve your life & earnings. Mediocres and lazy people are going to reap an empty harvest and will end up becoming servants to their contemporaries.

2. Do not step on other people’s head to climb your ladder of progress – sometimes people bad mouth or give a negative /evil report of a competitor in the bid to be awarded a contract or get a position. Hmmmn… there is always a reaping time even if you do get the job or position. The people you bad mouthed will get other opportunities even better while you will soon learn that it takes more than craftiness to achieve and maintain success. Soon the true picture of who you are will show. WAIT FOR YOUR TIME… IT PAYS.

3. Honesty & Integrity – in our world today it is difficult to believe or take people by their words. We have experienced so much disappointment and we see a lot of corruption. Everyone wants a kick back even before they do the job they are paid to do. Life is full of choices, its your prerogative to choose how you will do your business or job. Unusual opportunities comes to those who deal in integrity and honesty. Even the highly placed dishonest person knows who to look for when in need of someone to handle a bid deal that matters to him/her.

3. Be friendly and extend a helping hand– try and maintain a good relationship with everyone you deal with whether at work, home or on a project. No need to be saucy and high handed especially if you have an upper hand. You may need such persons to be the link that takes you up on your ladder of progress. It doesn’t mean you have to be best friends with everyone but be cordial and kind.

4. Show kindness it will come back to you.

Have yourself a great Friday and weekend.

Adebisi Adetunji (C) Project Director Beehyve Initiative.


Woman to Woman Talk #27 Stop Stressing Yourself About What You Can’t Change

We women are emotional beings and therefore little things can upset us. In a relationships women are the most hit when things take a downward turn or it doesn’t work out totally.

This is a short and straight to the point post that says to you : Stop Stressing yourself about what you can’t change in your man! People don’t change easily and so you are not responsible for his action but you can choose how you react to it.

Your peace of mind and sanity is important. Some of us try so hard to change our man but nothing is working. The nagging, frustration, tears and stress pile up.

My candid advice:
He may never change. Accept what you can but not when it is a physically abusive relationship. This one you must escape for your life!!

I am talking about issues between you and your spouse that borders on… He didn’t help with bathing the children; he didn’t give me enough money, he doesn’t care enough, he did this or that… Seriously ask him to help! Some men will see you doing all the work and just believe that you are fine… Ask him to help… Tell him you are tired and exhausted.

On other family issues please stop stressing yourself. Find a way around the issues and make yourself Happy.

No one is responsible for your happiness, you and God are. Human beings are so not perfect.

Be grateful for what you have; stop comparing your spouse with other people’s husband. Relax God is in control!

Stop stress yourself about what you can’t change woman. Enjoy your life.

Adebisi Adetunji (C)

What’s the Rush…Where are you Heading?

Early this morning while rushing off to work I looked ahead through the windshield. It was still dark as the sun is yet to rise and many other cars and drivers rushed by with their headlights helping them to see through the midst of Harmattan and sometimes flashing lights get into our eyes. I quickly took a picture and wondered about the rush of life and where everyone was headed. Everyone had hopes of making the best of another day; the hope of having a better life making a good living wage.

I thought to myself where are we all headed? Each person is heading for a different destination. Somewhere down the line the rush slows down or ends.

Just thinking out loud… What’s the rush for? Where are you heading? Channel your efforts right.

Adebisi Adetunji (C)

An Opportunity on a Notice Board- What She did with It.

A notice board on a national highway. Credits:

There are people that you meet and see every day and simply don’t know their story. They lift their heads each new day ready to make the best of the day. Opportunity comes once in a while and a window into someone’s life opens and then you are blown away by what you see and hear. I got such a rare opportunity with Nifesi (Not Real Name). She is one of our cleaners in my office (Why do I keep meddling?) and I heard something recently about her that lifted my spirits.

Nifesi’s Story – She dares to dream and pursue

I had a conversation with  Nifesi, who dared to pursue an opportunity she saw while sweeping on a notice board.

A week ago I heard that Nifesi now features on the station’s Language (Yoruba) news commentary and had even read a major news bulletin on one occasion. So when I had an opportunity to chat with her to find out more about what inspired her. The road to appearing in the news commentary report started with an announcement placed on the general notice board. Members of staff of the organization were asked to see the management and put their names down if they had skills in presenting Yoruba programs. Nifesi while sweeping the corridor saw the notice and something lite up in her head. “I can do this”, she said to herself.

Opportunities jump out in places least expected sometimes…pay attention and take your chance.

As soon as she was done cleaning, she went in search of everyone that matters and she was advised to start translating news bulletin in English to Yoruba. Nifesi started to practice translating this bulletin every day after her cleaning job. He would then show her translation to those experienced on the job. When she was ready to showcase what she could to, Nifesi approached the news director and programs director to beg them to allow her to read what she had translated. They listened at first politely not wanting to embarrass her. They told her to go and register her interest at the top management level. Nifesi kept going back and forth and would not stop until an audition was sanctioned. After this, others could now listen to what she could do and approved and fell in love with her voice.

You never know what you can do until you try, make that effort, go that extra mile

Even after this nod of approval that Nifesi had what it takes to translate and read news items in the Yoruba language nobody gave her a chance to come to the microphone. Nifesi kept on in hope doing her cleaning job while also still practicing translation of old news bulletin. A day came when those rostered for the news where unavoidably absent. Nifesi strolled in to pick a bulletin as usual to practice her translation and she was given the bulletin to be read for that day. She was trembling and very nervous, carrying out this task that she had dreamed of for months felt like been taken to the court to receive a life sentence. Nifesi in spite her nervousness took the challenge by the bull’s horns and faced it headlong. After featuring as the newsreader for that day, Nifesi received a lot of commendation and that is how she became a newsreader while still carrying out her duty as a cleaner who sweeps our offices and washes the toilet.

Keep pushing until you get a YES!!

I looked at Nifesi in admiration as she shared her story. I was curious and wanted to know more about her. My inquiry revealed that Nifesi while still working on her job as a cleaner had struggled to get a National Diploma(OND) at a Polytechnic as a part-time student. It was tough paying for her school fees. Nifesi would go cap in hand begging the school authority to allow her to pay in installments. Finally, she finished a course in Business Management. When I asked if she had collected her certificate Nifesi said she is yet to because she still owed the school a balance of her school fees. I hope she is able to raise the money because I sense that she may soon be ending her time as a cleaner.

You have what it takes to make that dream happen.

I raise my hands to salute a woman like Nifesi; a woman whom her husband abandoned because they had trouble with bearing children. A strong woman determined to move on with her life and pursue her dreams and goals in spite of her many trials and challenges.


Adebisi Adetunji(C)

Stuck & Don’t Know Where to Begin?! How to Get Out of that New Year Blues

Me thinking & wondering…

The new year is right here with us! Now you have to walk your way through it. There has been so much motivation and talks about setting new goals and plans. We are all been challenged to seize the year and make the best of it. Therefore in every area of life whether family, personal, career, education, Business, spiritual, health and much more we all want things to be better. We all want to experience growth.

2018 is here and you suddenly feel stuck and unable to take steps in any direction. If that is the case with you then you are not alone. I have a number of things penned down that I intend to pursue. I have some plans and goals but I keep having this unsure feeling; that feeling of where do I even start.

So here is how I am overcoming this new year blues:

  • Take your time and be clear about your goals and target.
  • Do not rush out and join the frenzy of achieving. Some of us will have to figure things out first remember it’s your own race.
  • Take one day at a time. 
  • Take small steps towards your first goal or plan. 
  •  Do what you can for now and let it grow gradually.
  • Do not be in a hurry to achieve everything at once.
  • Be patient and take your time.
  • Most importantly be prepared to enjoy your everyday in 2018, life is not all about setting goals😀

Adebisi Adetunji (C)

A Boxing Day Humor & Lesson

Boxing is the day after Christmas when people get to share gifts with their loved ones and friends.

In Nigeria, some of us cook our rice whether fried or Jollof and share with neighbors instead of doing this on Christmas day. The reason been that everyone will be busy attending Christmas service on the 25th of December and probably attending to immediate family.

So here I was delighted to package a gift for a family dear to mine. By the way I won’t share with you what the gift was… 😀😀Hmmm feeling good about sharing love oooo… Only to find out that I had mistakenly packaged a gift meant for someone else and given to another. Now I found myself replacing the gift with a precious gift I had earlier received as my Christmas present and I so cherished it.

Well how did the mix up happen? I guess I wasn’t paying attention. You see we had a family wedding this weekend, two days before Christmas and I had to juggle going to the market and planning for both feeding guests in my house and the reception!! So here I was having to reurn the gift to the original owner only my own precious gift was the replacement 😨.

It wasn’t funny but I learned a few minutes ago that I shouldn’t hold too tightly to anything. God gently nudging my heart and asking if that gift was too precious to give away. I  guess that’s the message of Christmas! After all He (God) gave his only begotten son to the world!

OK… So that’s how my own boxing Day went amidst attending to wedding guests of my brother in-law who were still in my house. Hope you’ve had a fabulous day amidst the fuel scarcity we are experiencing in Nigeria on! 😎

Adebisi Adetunji (C) BusyBee Media for Social Change and development.

The Last Lap of the Race…December 2017 is here!! 🌋 #Encouragement

👟👟👟👟👟👟👟 If you have ever been part of a long distance or miles race then you know that feeling when you look ahead and see the finishing line. Definitely your muscles will be aching and you are probably breathing through your mouth taking in as much air as you can. What keeps you going is that hope of finishing your race soon.

At the beginning of a race when the whistle goes off, all runners take off at once each still full of energy and the determination to win the race. Soon some will drop off the race for many reasons ranging from not been fit to endure the pain or simply just giving up.

Hope you haven’t given up on yourself and goals yet? Remember this journey of the year 2017 is your own race. There is no need to compare your successes or achievements with that of others.

Time to count your blessings as some other persons unfortunately didn’t make it this far but you made it. Be grateful and list your blessings, achievements and successes. Every little thing counts, celebrate your small and big successes.

I have so much I am grateful for that listing them will take the whole day but here is a few:

  • For the times when I failed and learned a few lessons.
  • For close doors though painful but led to new and beautiful opportunities. 
  •  For strength to go on even when I am weak. 
  • My children’s school promotion and ability to learn and apply knowledge.
  • My husband’s new milestone of owing his own school and building his business. 
  •  Gift of friends and family
  •  Gift of work
  • Gift of life and health
  • The gift of blogging 😀
  • And so much more

So here is the thing... You made it this far, have faith; have hope. All will end well in spite of the unpleasant experiences.

Happy New month!!

Adebisi Adetunji (C) BusyBee Media for Social Change & Development. @DebisiBusybee