The circle of cleansing was about to begin again. Now there are three spirits that must rest in peace. I look up to the ceiling where dark cobwebs hanged. A fly was caught in the web and a big spider circled around to feast on its prey. Obinna and I were now as a trapped as the fly. I turned to look at his tear-stained face and then my eyes monitored the rising and falling of his chest as he slept. It was necessary to assure myself that he was still breathing. We were both lying down on the wooden bed with the flat dirty mattress. My eyes went back to the ceiling where the spider had now reached its prey. The voices of the elders mixed with grandma’s plea to the gods to have mercy on our entire clan were now even louder.
I felt a choke in my throat and then fresh tears began to flow down my face. Their voices became distant as my mind traveled to that night I was stirred from my sleep by the whispering voice of my mother. “I won’t do it Ebuka”, said mother. “I’m only trying to fulfill the cleansing rites”, replied Uncle Ebuka. “Please leave now”, mother said in a harsh tone. I heard Uncle Ebuka’s short clipped laughter as he said, “Chinwe, you know the elders have spoken” and I heard his footsteps leaving. Mother started to sob quietly. I laid down not saying anything and my mind went back to the time father was still alive.
– An excerpt from one of my short stories collection.
Adebisi Adetunji (C) Founder Beehyve Empowerment and Development Initiative. Media content provider, Trainer & consultant-@debisibusybeemedia, Behavioral Change Radio Drama, Communication4Development, Social Media Influencer, Controller Programs (FRCN) Catch me on Twitter – @DebisiBusybee, Facebook & email – bisimodupe1975@gmail.com
Since Watching and listening to a music video by one of Nigeria’s music artist over the weekend a line from the lyrics hasn’t left my heart. You know the popular saying about “The grass is greener on the other side” Well here is another angle to it:
The Grass is Greener Where you Water the Ground – Adekunle Gold(Nigerian Musician)
So if you want a green grass, start wetting your own ground where you are. Have a great week!!
Adebisi Adetunji (C) Founder Beehyve Empowerment and Development Initiative. Media content provider, Trainer & consultant, Behavioral Change Radio Drama, Communication4Development, Social Media Influencer
Catch me on Twitter @DebisiBusybee
Facebook & email – bisimodupe1975@gmail.com
Team work at the Women in Development Summit organized by Ideation Hub Africa
Team work will take you far and help you achieve more.
working in a team opens you up to learningabout what others know and you don’t.
Teamwork gives room for creativity and it is an opportunity to carry out tasks quickly.
Working in a team is an escape route from spreading yourself too thin. Working alone can put you under so much pressure and stress. Learn to share the workload with your team members.
Stop being a Local champion thinking you are the best; there is so much value others can bring into your life, tasks and projects.
Working with a team is fun and gives you company. You are not alone to bear the challenges and failures that sometimes comes with carrying out tasks/projects.
None of us is as good as all of us.
Adebisi Adetunji (C) Founder Beehyve Empowerment and Development Initiative. Media content provider, Trainer & consultant, Behavioral Change Radio Drama, Communication4Development. Catch me on Twitter @DebisiBusybee
Facebook & email – bisimodupe1975@gmail.com
At an FGMC workshop organized by YoungMen Against Sexual & gender based violence.
Life is a teacher and everyday each one of us is presented with an opportunity to learn.How we choose to handle our jobs, family, business, career and the pursuit of our dreams can eventually make or mar our progress.
Perhaps the thought line should be about “the how” you make progress. A few tips:
1. Give your best and go that extra mile – when we give our best and do more, someone that matters is observing. It is likely that you get even bigger opportunities that will improve your life & earnings. Mediocres and lazy people are going to reap an empty harvest and will end up becoming servants to their contemporaries.
2. Do not step on other people’s head to climb your ladder of progress –sometimes people bad mouth or give a negative /evil report of a competitor in the bid to be awarded a contract or get a position. Hmmmn… there is always a reaping time even if you do get the job or position. The people you bad mouthed will get other opportunities even better while you will soon learn that it takes more than craftiness to achieve and maintain success. Soon the true picture of who you are will show. WAIT FOR YOUR TIME… IT PAYS.
3. Honesty & Integrity – inour world today it is difficult to believe or take people by their words. We have experienced so much disappointment and we see a lot of corruption. Everyone wants a kick back even before they do the job they are paid to do. Life is full of choices, its your prerogative to choose how you will do your business or job. Unusual opportunities comes to those who deal in integrity and honesty. Even the highly placed dishonest person knows who to look for when in need of someone to handle a bid deal that matters to him/her.
3. Be friendly and extend a helping hand– try and maintain a good relationship with everyone you deal with whether at work, home or on a project. No need to be saucy and high handed especially if you have an upper hand. You may need such persons to be the link that takes you up on your ladder of progress. It doesn’t mean you have to be best friends with everyone but be cordial and kind.
4. Show kindness itwill come back to you.
Have yourself a great Friday and weekend.
Cheers, Adebisi Adetunji (C) Project Director Beehyve Initiative.
We women are emotional beingsand therefore little things can upset us. In a relationships women are the most hit when things take a downward turn or it doesn’t work out totally.
This is a short and straight to the point post that says to you : Stop Stressing yourself about what you can’t change in your man! People don’t change easily and so you are not responsible for his action but you can choose how you react to it.
Your peace of mind and sanity is important. Some of us try so hard to change our man but nothing is working. The nagging, frustration, tears and stress pile up.
My candid advice:
He may never change. Accept what you can but not when it is a physically abusive relationship. This one you must escape for your life!!
I am talking about issues between you and your spouse that borders on… He didn’t help with bathing the children; he didn’t give me enough money, he doesn’t care enough, he did this or that… Seriously ask him to help! Some men will see you doing all the work and just believe that you are fine… Ask him to help… Tell him you are tired and exhausted.
On other family issues please stop stressing yourself. Find a way around the issues and make yourself Happy.
No one is responsible for your happiness, you and God are. Human beings are so not perfect.
Be grateful for what you have; stop comparing your spouse with other people’s husband. Relax God is in control!
Stop stress yourself about what you can’t change woman. Enjoy your life.
