One Way to Prevent Abortion

Abortion is the termination of pregnancy or fetus in the womb before it can survive outside the body. An abortion can be said to be induced when a miscarriage occurs or deliberate when the individual chooses to terminate the pregnancy.

Why is this done
Usually, abortion is carried out because an individual or a couple is not willing to have a baby that is already conceived. Sometimes an abortion is carried out due to health implications to the mother or fetus. Then miscarriages happen and a baby is aborted before it reaches full term for delivery.

There are arguments for and against the morality of doing an abortion. Whichever side of the divide you belong to I believe the most important thing is to deal with the reason why anyone would want to do an abortion. My own point of view though on the matter is that abortion infringes on the rights of an unborn life. Going for the option of an abortion is a big choice and is not a simple matter. There are risks involved in doing one and a woman should not take this step without proper counseling and be informed about choices available.

Who & Who would Get an Abortion
1) I see young school girls endanger themselves every now and then attempting to abort a baby. Many of them try to get rid of a pregnancy that “just happens” while been sexually active irresponsibly. Often we hear of girls who try to get an abortion using all kinds of dangerous stuff that sometimes becomes fatal as the girl dies doing this or her womb is damaged leading to serious complications later in life when ready to have a baby.
2) Another group is couples/married people who are not ready to have a baby and pregnancy occurs anyway. So they opt for aborting the baby.
3) This group is what we call sex workers who by the nature of what they do are engaged regularly or on daily basis in an activity that can bring “babies from heaven”. When pregnancy occurs with these ladies they try to get rid of it because hey it is bad for business. Sometimes they do have the babies but imagine how many other pregnancies have been aborted.
4) This group, I will call the “encouragers” or the ones who point women and girls in the direction. The Boys and Men who are not ready to be fathers and flippantly tell their girlfriend or lover to get an abortion. Sounds easy, “is it not just to flush the thing out; I mean it is not yet a life”, says such men.

Circle Bead – A modern family planning method(femininematerz photo)

The Way Out – Know more About Family Planning Options/ Contraceptives
I will try to look at the different categories above
Schoolgirls/Teenagers: I am a strong advocate for abstinence but what can we do sometimes when young people want to experiment or are already sexually active? As a parent, I will do my best to support and help my children to wait and not rush into gratifying their sexual God-given appetite, for indeed it can be controlled and waiting is worth it. It worked for me their mother and some others that I have seen.

However, I have met a number of young people who are already sexually active and the question of introducing the use of contraceptives sounds like a good idea. My church mind sends a red alert every time I hear people talking about educating young people about their options when it comes to choice of a contraceptive (condoms, pills etc.). But over time I have learned that sometimes this is the best option for a young person who is sexually active.

An experience that I do regret was a teenage girl’s case I intervened in while working on a maternal and child project (Abiye-saving a mother/Infant). I will call her Mary. She had to stop going to school because she got pregnant and had a baby. My team and I helped to get a home for her baby while we linked her with someone willing to sponsor her education and who also took her in giving Mary a home and family.

One of the intervention piece of advice we got was to take her to a family planning clinic and help her get a contraceptive method done since she was sexually active. Guess what? We felt it will mean that we were encouraging her to be promiscuous, so we didn’t do anything about it. We would later regret it because soon Mary became even engaged in sexual activities as she was now free of taking care of her baby. Mary left that family and stopped going to school and as we followed up on her case, she aborted a number of pregnancies after that and almost lost her life at some point. Still, Mary won’t stop and now she has two more babies and is inaccessible to us.

So if a girl is sexually active get her to obtain a family planning method to prevent unplanned pregnancy while also working on helping her to make the choice of delaying gratification. And this is not just for girls teach your boy to be responsible. Let him know that If he wants to engage in sex he must know that means he can impregnate a girl so abstinence or use of a condom is advised.

Couples/Married
If you are not ready to have a baby; go get a contraceptive or family planning method done instead of aborting that baby. This allows couples to pursue their goals and careers; the woman is able to rest in between births and they can both have the number of children they can provide for. Visit a family planning clinic or see your doctor to get proper counseling on your choice.

Let’s reduce the number of abortions by opting for contraceptives.Create a world where every pregnancy is wanted.

Adebisi Adetunji(C)

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No Woman Should Die Giving Birth to Another Life: Preventive Measures

BBC photo

 

It is really disturbing hearing that another woman or any woman just lost her life after delivering her baby.

In the compound where we live the cries of an elderly woman who lost a dear young woman filters through our window. We rushed out and knocked on her door. She managed to unlock her door and with our concerned and worried faces we stepped in asking her like ten questions all at once. That was when we found out a lady dear to her, someone she had worked with at her office before retirement had just died. They lost her after the birth of her third child… It was a very painful news for me.

I am not sure of the details of the complications that could have arisen during or after delivery of her baby but I just simply know that… THIS Shouldn’t BE!Complications that can lead to maternal and child death include:

  • Bleeding/hearmorrahage, pregnancy induced high blood pressure. 
  • Lack of going for antenatal
  • Engaging services of untrained midwives or health care providers;
  • Refusal to follow the doctor’s advice
  • Sometimes it is the careless mistakes of health personnel or anyone taking the delivery of the baby and more.
  • Having too many births in quick successions.
  • Prolonged labor due to narrow birth canal and a baby with a big weight or a breached baby.

A lot more needs to be done to prevent these needless deaths of mothers and their babies. Those to ensure this:

  • The pregnant woman herself – Eat right, take your immunizations, go for regular check up at your antenatal clinic, carry out all necessary and routine checks.
  • Husband/spouse – Be involved and ensure that your wife goes for all her antenatal visits; encourage her to eat and rest well ; watch out for any emergency signs and don’t delay in getting medical intervention.
  • Families should not insist on old traditional harmful delivery practises.

Other preventive means for maternal deaths or birth complications:

  1. Stop female circumcision/FGMC – This causes scaring in the vagina of such a woman or girl therefore narrowing the birth canal. No wonder then that such a woman experiences prolonged labor and tear that could lead to VVF if the case is not managed properly.
  2. Stop the use of traditional birth attendants and engage trained health personnel.
  3. Adopt a modern family planning method to allow mothers to rest in between births. It also enables a family to have only the number of children they can cater for. Family Planning also prevents a woman who has been otherwise advised by her doctor to stop having children on health/wellbeing grounds.
  4. After delivery ensure the woman goes for her postnatal visit to the hospital. There she gets medical check up.
  5. Rest.. Rest and rest after delivery. Don’t rush into doing your normal work routine doing so much than your body can handle.
  6. Naming ceremony can wait if the mother and child are still receiving medical care after delivery.

And seriously a Ceaserian Section is not a taboo or evil! It is a perfectly safe way to ensure that a mother and baby go through the delivery process safely.

No woman should die giving birth to another life.

Adebisi Adetunji (C)

Reaching People at Home & Work Places with Information about FP

Engaging our community and dialoguing with members at the grassroot level about Family Planning is key to poverty eradication and family empowerment.

Once while working with ARDA & NURHI on the field going from house to house, business centers dialoguing and informing people better about the need to plan their families we met a group of men. It was interesting discussing the issue with these men, some agreed that couples should only give birth to the number of children they can cater for but one man’s opinion stood out. This man whom I will call Bode believed that a man has a right to keep giving birth to as many children as he desired. Then we raised the issue if how frequent and too many births can affect a woman’s health. The discussion then centered on the wellbeing of his wife; Bode believed that he would keep acquiring more women to give birth to more children.

I looked at Bode and it was obvious that he didn’t earn much. Bode like many others hold the cultural believe that the Lord Almighty who gives children will take care of them. I believe that God is the giver of children and he also makes provision to care for them. However he expects us to be responsible therefore he will also hold us, parents accountable if we do not train and equip our children with all they need to become responsible men and women in the society.

I see many women at the grassroot suffer and struggle to take care of children because their husbands/men are busy donating babies to as many other women. Forgive me if I sound rather hard here.

Then there are men who will insist that the woman(his wife)  should just keep having as many babies as possible to the detriment of her health and the family’s wellbeing.

Family Planning means having the number of children one can care & provide for.

Family planning is key to preventing abortions. 

Family planning has helped couples who didn’t know any better to stop aborting babies. I have met a few couples who were able to relax in between births before having another baby and no longer had to abort unplanned pregnancy.

Life is all about the choices we make. These choices in turn make us and our future.

Adebisi Adetunji (C)

#SAFE MOTHERHOOD – Do You Know that Parts of a baby Forms 3 weeks after Conception? How to Have a Healthy Baby.

Your baby’s development and growth starts in the womb and not just after birth. Most times we begin to count a child’s age when he/she is born. I’d like to think that the nine months in the womb should be added. Yes, the life of any child begins at conception. It is therefore important that a woman understands that once she gets pregnant everything and anything she does can affect the development of her child.

As early as three weeks after conception occurs a baby’s organs internally and physically begins to form (head, hand, fingers, intestine, heart etc.) So it is very important for a mother to start eating right and taking care of herself right from the time she is aware that another life is growing in her. I would say even before you get pregnant eat right, eat a balanced diet and feed well. Then your body can have enough supply of nutrients, vitamins, minerals needed by you and your baby.

What you eat; how you take care of yourself and health during pregnancy matters.

Foods rich in nutrient to help your baby develop well in the womb:

  • Eat a lot of proteinous foods such as egg, fish, meat, beans, Moimoi, Akara(Bean Cake) – Helps your baby’s brain and muscle development.
    Specifically Beans – contains Zinc an important mineral that helps to give your baby adequate birth weight and cut down the risk of having a pre-term baby.
  • Fruits (Orange, banana, Apple, grapes, Guava, etc.) contain lots of vitamins.
  • Dairy products such as milk, yogurt – This is rich in calcium necessary for the development of your baby’s bones, teeth.
  • Foods rich in fiber such as oatmeal, cereals rich in wheat – This class of food contain vitamins and proteins.
  • Vegetables such as carrot, cabbage, efo tete, ugwu leaf and so much more – These are rich in vitamins and minerals.
  • Water is essential in helping organs of the body to function properly. Water aids digestion, circulation of nutrients in the body and oxygen flow in the body. Therefore water is very important in pregnancy. Take a lot of water in pregnancy.

Most malformation (birth defects) occur when the organs are forming and what can cause this include effects of drugs used without doctor’s prescription or exposure to radiation. 

Beware Alcohol, smoking and taking drugs without a doctor’s prescription can have serious implication on your baby.

Warning Alcohol affects the development and health of a baby in the womb and after birth.

Photo Credit: BBC

Adebisi Adetunji (C)

Woman to Woman Talk #14 – Beware when taking a Taxi – Where to Get Help For Rape Victims #Nigeria

A dear girl shared her story about a horrible experience after boarding a taxi. I will call her Bimbo. On this fateful day, Bimbo arrives town on a visit to see a few friends. It was evening and she was in a hurry to pick a taxi to get her to her destination before it gets dark.

A cab stopped right by her and she quickly scanned to be sure the passengers were not all men as that connotes that it might not be safe to board. Luckily there was a woman in the taxi so Bimbo was at ease boarding it. A few minutes after they took off the driver went in a direction that raised her danger alarm bells. It turned out that the driver and passengers were intent on robbing her. If they had only robbed her Bimbo would have only had to count her losses in terms of money. In fact, when these cab thieves did not find enough money on Bimbo they collected her ATM and withdrew all that was left in her account. The most disheartening thing was that the male passengers even raped her while a fellow woman watched!!! Bimbo was robbed of her possession and her body. She cursed these passengers which included men a woman.

When it comes to RAPE Silence is not Golden.

 

I asked Bimbo whether she reported this matter to anyone. She refused to tell anyone that she was raped except when she and I had a chat recently. Bimbo was too ashamed. She visited a clinic to take care of any pregnancy that could occur as a result of the rape but what about the emotional and psychological wounds. Bimbo was too ashamed to tell anyone and my heart really goes out to her. I was really disturbed and mad about what happened to Bimbo. She will need to be helped to overcome any trauma still lurking in her heart.

How can you protect yourself from being robbed or raped when taking a taxi?

  • There are parking garages for taxis going to any part of the town. Usually, taxis line up in a queue waiting to get a full number of passengers before taking off to their destinations. Most times you and I are not willing to wait patiently for the taxi/cab to get filled and so we pick what is known as soole in Yoruba that is taxis who are on the move by the road side. So you jump in not knowing whether they are robbers or rapists even! Please be careful
  • Get out of your home or office early enough and pick a taxi at the motor park instead of taking just anyone you see on the road.
  • Avoid late night waka waka o

Help For Rape Victims

I present to you an organization with a vision to create a society where women, men, and children are free from rape and sexual violence:

STAND TO END RAPE INITIATIVE

I am Standing to End Rape: Join Me & Others

Their services include but not limited to:
• Peer mentoring for rape survivors
• Therapeutic sessions with healthcare professionals
• Counseling, support, and treatment

Contact Information:
S.T.E.R Initiative
No 1A, Kola Adeyina Close, Lekki Phase 1
Mobile: +2348095967000
Email: contactus@standtoendrape.org
standtoendrape@gmail.com

S.T.E.R Initiative work on cases in various states in Nigeria, simply reache out to the team.

Remember don’t be silent, speak up and help to end rape
Speaking up means you get help as a rape victim survivor.

Please be safe; stay safe
Adebisi Adetunji ©

Breastfeeding #2 – What is your take on Companies/organizations Providing a Baby Creche for Nursing Mothers?

The other day I was having an official chat with my boss and something she said warmed my heart.

Recently a number of our pregnant women in the office just delivered their babies. Four months of maternity leave wrapped up quickly and before you could say “Jack Robinson” they resumed work. A few of these mothers brought their babies to the office with a maid carrying the baby outside in the car, in the parking lot while mummy worked. The mother will dash out every now and then to breastfeed and get back to attending to official matters.

It was mostly a case of wanting to do exclusive Breastfeeding and to achieve this meant they had to bring their babies since there was no baby Creche  anywhere close to the office.

During our chat, this my boss looked out the window and saw a mother rushing to breastfeed her baby in the parking lot and she shared a thought she had been brooding over. She was on a hunt for a container that will be furnished and turned into a baby Creche for our nursing mothers. I felt it was really thoughtful of her. She planned on getting sponsors for this project to make this dream come through as the organization will likely not provide such a service.

My Question

What is your take on companies/organizations providing baby Creche for nursing mothers?

Some people will say it is not cost effective as these mothers are already being paid.. Hmmmn what do you think?

Please share your thoughts.

Baby Creche: A nursery where babies and young children are taken care of while their mum’s work. 

Adebisi Adetunji (C)

Breastfeeding #1: A Healthy Baby Bonding With Mother

Breastfeeding makes a happy and healthy baby.
Breastfeeding gives a mother great moments to bond with her child.
Breast milk contains all the nutrients your baby needs to grow healthy.

Exclusive Breastfeeding for the first 6 months of life is worth it. To achieve this companies and organizations need to provide baby care centers to enable nursing mothers breast feed their babies.

To Every Nursing Mother: Eat healthy by taking a balanced diet. Take a lot of fluid such as water, Pap/Ogi,  coca oat, tea and fruits🍉🍏🍋🍅🍓🍇. If you are from Africa particularly Nigeria abeg eat correct Amala, Eba, Future with a lot of vegetable. Hehehe enjoy!

Feed yourself very well in order to have the energy and strength to breastfeed your baby. That’s the way to take care of those hunger dizzy spells that occur after breastfeeding all night or any other time of day. 😀😀

Happy Breastfeeding Week.

Adebisi Adetunji (C)