Woman to Woman Talk #6 – “Je ki Oko o De” – Empower yourself Financially

This week let’s talk about empowering ourselves as women. “Je ki Oko o de” literally means “A woman who waits and depends on her husband to buy or pay for everything she needs personally or to keep the home running”.

Some time ago I heard of a woman whose husband set her up in a business two or three different times. I will call her Titi(not real name).
Titi enjoys sitting at home and watching movies, shopping for new clothes, visiting and chatting with friends. When it comes to running her business she isn’t interested. And so everytime she starts a business she ruins it losing both capital and profit. Titi is comfortable with just living a flamboyant life and sitting at home. Lucky for  her she has a man who is rich. However the man soon got fed up of having to help her set up any business and losing all the money. This became an issue in their family.

Another category of “Je Oko o De women are young ladies who are not even properly educated or come from a humble background.  They marry a man struggling to make ends meet and simply refuse to work.  The man is expected to take care of her, their 7 children and the home. If she wants to buy salt, sugar, food and even her underwears she waits for her dear husband to pay for everything! (Ridiculous). Such a woman is at the mercy of the poor husband who has to pay for everything. Unfortunately some of these men spend their money on other things and not on these wives.

So woman, lady here is the thing, It is time you make something out of your life! You need to be financially empowered!

It is time you pay attention to minding your business or career.

Lady forget that gist that a man us solely meant to be the provider. Some of my friends will say do you want to kill him in this economic recession! 😀.

And seriously you need to be free and able to meet some of your own financial needs. It is unfair to yourself and your husband to depend on him for everything. It is frustrating in my own opinion.

Why you need to earn your own money:
1) It enables you to be financially free,
2) You get that rewarding feeling that you can contribute to the upkeep of your family.
3) You have a sense of dignity being able to make some money no matter how little.
4) You are able to give your aged parents money without hassling your man to do it.
5) It eases money tension in the home and saves you the embarrassment of not been able to handle even simple money needs of your children.
6) God forbid anything happening to the man...I mean people die so what happens to you and your children. Especially if the man’s extended family are the type that will come and take over the man’s property leaving his wife with nothing.
7) Say your man even loses his job or business what will you all fall back on?Your own earnings can save the family financial embarrassment before your man finds his feet again.

The virtuous in the book of proverbs was a hard working business woman who provided for her household and her husband was respected in the gates of the city. STOP Being Lazy!

Time to pursue your dreams, time to mind your business and career.

In another post we will take a look at ways to make money as a woman. Till then enjoy your everyday life and know that you are special, woman.

Adebisi Adetunji (C)

Fade’s Touch – Reignite Your Beauty: How to Harness Your Child’s potential

Meet Federera Okunubi at work:

Fade doing makeover for a client
Finishing touches to the makeover

She is the daughter of my 16years hair stylist….really I am amazed that I have stayed with her for this long. The secret of course is good service and a good customer relationship. We are like family now I believe. It is difficult to get me into the salon of another hair stylist to make my hair.

Fade and mum braiding my hair

I first met Iya Fade as we all call her in 2001, then Fade the all grown lady wasn’t even in secondary school yet. This post is set to promote the need to pass down your skills to your children. You will be simply equipping them with tools for a better future. She has grown to become a very beautiful lady and I imagine the suitor’s queue is really long. This is her story as I chatted with her while she and her mum braided my hair.

At first, Fade was not interested in learning how to make other people’s hair. She was young and did not understand why she had to get her hand all dirt in wet waters. However an unce and aunty of hers convinced her that it was good to acquire this skill alongside getting an education. At least she did not have to pay to learn. Slowly and grudgingly at first she began to pay more attention while in her mother’s salon. Soon she picked up interest and became passionate about making hairstyles for customers.

What I admire  Iya Fade for is that she is got taste and is classy; she is creative, hardworking very good at her craft. She seems to thrive on all handy craft as often she makes hair creams, soaps, body cream to cater for the hair needs and treatments of her customers. And she uses natural products to make the blend. If you’ve got issues with your hair Iya Fade is a hair stylist you need to see.

So you can begin to understand the rich skills Fade stand to gain from her mother by paying attention. Thankfully she did pay attention. Right now Fade is competing well with her mum and even doing more.

Fade got admission into the Obafemi Awolowo University, Ile Ife to study the course: English Language. In school she was learning and making some change making fellow students hair. So that means she is never broke.

Right now Fade is done with her University education and waiting to go for her National Youth Service Corp(NYSC) but she got busy going to a makeover school and also started to attend a business management school in order to be able to manage her own business.

Fade is now the CEO of Fade’s Touch. Her business provides these services for clients:
1) Hair-do – All kinds of hair styles ranging from braids, dread, weaves, natural style, natural hair care, fixing of weavon.

Looking cool in my newly braided hair by Fade & mum
Fade styling the weavon of her customer

2) Makeover – Bridal makeover, home services, Owanbe-party make up, dinner makeover, casual makeover
3) Pedicure/Manicure
4) Sale of Make-up products
5) Sale of shoes & Bags
I told Fade that she will probably soon start employing her colleagues😀😀👍

I am so pleased to see that this young woman has carved a niche for herself. She will not be under pressure in the labour market looking for a job. She has become an employer herself.

Allow your children get more than a school education. Harness that gifting and talents. Let them acquire skills that will put more value on them in the labour/business market.

You can reach Fade’s Touch for your beauty services on:
Phone No: 08164423645
Instagram : Fade_rera
Twitter: @fade_rera

Adebisi Adetunji(C)

12 Success Tips for Project Managers

What you need to manage that project well and achieve a measurable success:

1) write down a clear blueprint for the project – This is where you put down the aim/purpose of the project; what you hope to achieve.

2) Develop the blueprint, aims, and objectives of the project with the organization hiring you as the project manager. It is important that you the project manager is on the same page with the project’s commissioner. This will prevent a misunderstanding while carrying out the project.

3) Identify team members you need to carry out the project successfully.

4) Sell the aim of the project to your team members clearly. Let them have a buy-in and team members should be clear about their roles and expected delivery time.

5) Get team members involved in the planning stage of the step by step processes of execution of the project. This will help them to feel like they own the project. It will also give a clear picture of what is expected on the field while gathering data or fulfilling their part in the project.

6) Write a budget that will cover all expenses such as staff salaries, transportation, accommodation, the cost of field trips, the fee for contractors.

7) As a project manager assess the progress of the project against your timeline for execution by taking note of what isn’t working; what needs to be improved upon; achievement so far and how much work still needs to be done. Ensure that team members have reports for each stage ready and sent to you for preview.

8) Don’t forget to let the hiring organization know their own role in implementing the project such as access to information; key staff needed to provide necessary input to make implementation possible.

9) Draw and sign an agreement stating clearly what area of the project will be covered by you and your team; what area will be handled by the hiring organization; what you will not do. This will prevent incitement of extra cost that may arise from the employer suddenly wanting to saddle you with responsibilities that are not part of the project initially.

10) Be clear that the hiring organization is willing and ready to pay you for the execution of the project. Agree on fees, how and when it will be paid before commencing with the project. Get paid with a responsible mobilization Fee that will help run the project.

11) Have a measurable assessment plan in place: This will help to assess to what extent the project achieved its aims and objectives. This very important to know whether a project was successful. It will also help to determine whether to consolidate on the present achievements.

12) Be honest and pay your team members what you have agreed upon. Do not short change them. Make them happy as they are the ones who will help make a success of the project. This will, in turn, make you look good in the eyes of the hiring organization. Your recommendation score goes up.

Most importantly take on projects that match your skills and you are equipped to execute successfully. 

Adebisi Adetunji (C)

Thinking out loud…Gender Musings (Guest Post #3)

There are parts of me that have been hiding all my life. I’m daily surprised by the emergence of new aspirations, new dreams, new fears, new flaws, new hopes and new traits I was not expecting.

Why am I digging up and dusting old dreams. It probably never died. Through these new discoveries, I’m reminded that as long as I engage in the process of continuous self-development, new discoveries are inevitable.

The concept I have of myself, my value, my very purpose in life form the core of what influences my personality. So when I am quiet it is for a reason. When I am assertive and refuse to back down in an argument, it is for a reason. When I remain indifferent about an issue, there’s a reason for it.

I strive to be intentional and deliberate about my every act. But I’m asking will it change when I marry? Will I have to “adjust” my personality to suit my in-laws? Will I be assertive enough as a mother to ensure my children are well disciplined?

As I advance in age, will I have the resolve and energy to pursue new projects and initiatives? How will hormonal changes affect my well-being? Will I age gracefully indeed?

Do you as a woman also go through these eeerm say gender musings?

oyinkan FMB

This post was written by Oyinkansola Peter-Ajayi.
Oyinkan is a Correspondent and Presenter with Radio Nigeria.
She lives by the mantra, “Eagles don’t flock” and tweets @Oyinpeter_ajayi

My Blog : Beyond my Wildest Dreams

LEARNING

I am unto a new journey of improving on what i do here on my blog which is to write. Learning should never stop and the best way to do better is to keep learning. So i decided to enroll in this course powered by WordPress Blogging U: “Blogging, Branding and Growth”.

KNOW BETTERMy first assignment is to set three Goals about what i want to achieve with my blog.

I have more than three  -here they are:

  • I want to have more  interesting and interactive blog posts that inspires at least 20 comments for now
  • I want to make new friends and keep them: learning and supporting their blogs too
  • I want to have 500 followers and readers
  • I want a blog brand that attracts profit(money)
  • Most importantly to continue to enjoy blogging

And here is my long term goal:

  • I want my blog to become a spring board for policy changes that will make life better for women, Girls and children.

And so the hard work and journey continues….A shout out to my readers, followers and friends in the blogging community!!!

Photo Credits: Quotesgram.com (1) Funderstanding (2)

Adebisi Adetunji (C)