Dear Diary…Something Terrible Happened on Campus…TBEE Writes #19

I dragged my body out of bed lazily this morning really feeling tired and exhausted from studying till 2 a.m last night. It is not easy to be a student o! You see my goal is to get  first class and so far my grades from the first year are looking good. Our exams are coming up two weeks from now and I hope to read my handouts and notes from cover to cover.

Hurriedly I got ready for class and on my way, I scrolled through my text messages and sure enough, DT had sent me like three early morning love notes. I smiled and felt this is how to pamper a girl you love. DT knows how to make my world spin. I looked forward to catching up with him after lectures. My zeal for the day was rejuvenated but on getting to the lecture theater I saw students standing in groups and talking. Something was definitely up…my chest became heavy … I prayed and hoped it was not another bad news of losing one of our course mates. So far this semester there hasn’t been any fatal incidence apart from the lady who burnt her roommate with electric Iron. Thank goodness it the girl in question is fine.

I walked towards where Lizzy was standing with Peter the class governor and some others. “Guys, why is everyone standing outside instead of been seated in the lecture hall”, I said. Lizzy held her folder containing a few notebooks around her chest looking really blue. Agitated I asked, “will someone tell me what is going on here”! Peter responded finally, “It’s Dr. Bosun”. My heart started to race, “hope he is not…”Lizzy finally got her voice back, “no he is not dead but critically injured and in the hospital”.

The whole gist came tumbling out. The previous night, Dr. Bosun was attacked somewhere around the campus. His car was vandalized and he was seriously beaten. This meant that his class for this morning was automatically canceled. I was flabbergasted and not happy even though I had just recently been the object of Dr. Bosun’s attraction. No one knew who the attackers were. Trust students, some believed that perhaps Dr. Bosun was reaping from his past actions of harassing his students. The gist is that the school authority had vowed to investigate the matter and deal decisively with the perpetrators.

At last, we were forced to all disperse to attend other lectures for the day but this Dr. Bosun’s incidence became the center of discussions throughout the day. There are students who will really be happy about the fact that he was dealt with in that way. I mean there are many female students repeating his course simply because they won’t accept his sexual advances. Could it be one of them or what is it just that he ran into some cult guys who were about their usual midnight routine? Hmmmn, God please save us from these cult guys o. I really hope that they will be caught so we can have a safer campus.

The good thing about this is that now I have been spared the stress of having to turn down Dr. Bosun’s disguised advances in the name of been his P.A at a seminar. Life is full of twist and turns …hmmmn see how God saved me…now that is a wicked thought! Well…I wish him a quick recovery. Goodnight dear diary.

Catch up on Previous episodes of Dear Diary

Dear Diary…An Invitation to my Lecturers Office…TBEE Writes #16

Dear Diary…The Soup Thief was Caught But A threat is Underway TBEE Writes #18

 

Adebisi Adetunji (C)

Little things matter – My Android Phone and I

Getting my Andriod phone was for me a matter of necessity. I didn’t buy one to show off or be part of the trend…although that is not exactly an out of place thing. I remember bringing out my old phone that could only take pictures, make calls and receive text messages amongst friends or a business meeting…oh…it was kind of embarrassing. Especially when you see everyone at the table in a meeting sliding their fingers across their Android phone while you struggle to press on the keypad of your “torch light phone” as we call it. 

And then someone will say are you on whatsapp? Definitely not, I didn’t own a smart phone that time. Good old Nokia phone…they are die hards. My small torch light phone has survived many falls into unthinkable places for the life span of a phone. I was to later miss this when my newly acquired Android which by the way I saved for to get suddenly refused to charge!!!

The diagnosis at the phone care center of the brand I bought  was that I had a charging port problem. At first, I was relieved but my quick fix was not going to happen as fast as I wanted. The company didn’t have the parts available…I stood looking at the customer care lady with a glare that said, “you guys can’t be serious”! But I was told to keep checking in until the charging port part arrives from wherever which had no particular date…frustrating!!

Even waiting at the reception of the phone care center felt like I was waiting to see the doctor at the hospital only this was a phone clinic. I went home disappointed that day and came back a few days later determined to get my phone fixed ,”sorry they said again, the parts are yet to arrive”.

That day I met a fellow frustrated phone user who had like three batteries all for one phone. He advised me to buy an extra battery and a strong desktop charger to solve my problem. So off I went shopping for a desktop charger and screen saver. After getting the desktop charger another challenge came up. I soon found out that Android batteries were more powerful than desktop chargers. So I would charge my battery for like 12 hours before I get a certain percentage of my charged battery which will quickly run down.

It wasn’t funny because I had come to depend on my Android phone to do my work on the go. God bless the brains behind this technology. I would send WhatsApp messages, attend to my emails; work on my social media platforms and even write on my blog all on the go!!

Lessons I learned while waiting to get my phone fixed
• Never be careless with your gagdet. Getting it is not enough even when you denied yourself to be able to afford it. You have got to take good care of it.
• Android phones don’t come cheap but they are not as rugged as good old phones that can withstand any pressure.
• When plugging your charger on your phone’s charging point handle with care. It can easily get spoilt as is the case in my experience.
• Plug the phone yourself and not your young children who can mishandle it
• Be patient seasons of phonelessness don’t last 

Today after three long weeks I finally got a new charging port for my phone but not without a fight(not physical). So I called the phone clinic and I get the good news that the much awaited charging port parts have arrived. I quickly rushed to the phone company fix it center only to be told that according to company policy I will have to leave my phone for a week. Reason…there many other phones under repair. “No way”, I said and then I got an idea to call the nice young man who happened to be one of the engineers I had been communicating with inquiring about the parts. Hurray! he offered to get my phone fixed and within an hour my Android phone had a brand new charging port.

I am so happy that my phone is back and alive…Grateful!! Funny how a small charging port problem became a big issue!!

Adebisi Adetunji (C)

Training Opportunity: Safe Motherhood Education

I wish I had had an opportunity to learn about safe motherhood as a young girl/lady. In preparing a girl to settle down in marriage mothers are expected to teach her to cook, clean, wash and manage a home. Then as your wedding day draws near you get a little gist about satisfying your man sexually…Bedroom matters that nobody even gives you detailed instruction about how it works. We usually stumble along the way finding out as days, weeks and months pass by. Well this is a story for another blog post.

This post is about how to equip young women single and married about safe motherhood. Trust me this is very important especially if you intend to have children. My personal story and journey into motherhood was a turbulent one. It almost cost my life and that of my baby. I simply didn’t know and my young husband didn’t know any better. We made a lot of unhealthy mistakes that even now I still regret.

Knowledge they say is power…here is an opportunity to get the necessary information and keys to a safe motherhood…it might save your life or someone close to you.

Who is organizing the Training?
Life Builders, a Non-profit Organization is facilitating this training

Theme: Safe Motherhood Education Training

It is a flexible two days (Saturdays) training spread across two weekends.

What to expect/Topics:

First Day – 8th April, 2017
Before Pregnancy: Know Yourself; Prepare yourself
During Pregnancy: Attending Ante natal; Periodic Pelvic Scans
During Labour

Second Day – 22nd April, 2017
Post-Partum Period: Breast feeding, Immunization, Exercises that will help the uterus return to pre pregnancy stage;
Nutrition: Know your baby; Weaning Class; Eating for two and still maintaining a good shape.
Family Planning/next pregnancy: Sex Post-Partum, Child Spacing/Contraceptive; Returning to work/day care/housekeeper; Cancer Prevention – Periodic check

Venue: Life Builders, Ikolaba Agodi G. R. A, Ibadan.
Time/Duration: 10am – 2pm daily

Facilitators:

Dr. Otolorin

Mrs Grace Oluwatoye – 08033745604

Mrs Kilanko

To participate in this training – Send your name to these numbers 07013141188, 08132338817 (50 Slots available)
Email: lifebuildersnig@gmail.com

Adebisi Adetunji ©

Meet and Greet: 4/1/17

At Drey’s blog connect with others. Its a great time in the blogging community

Dream Big, Dream Often

 dreambigwallpaper-pinkombre

It’s the Meet and Greet weekend everyone!!  Strap on your party shoes and join the fun!  

Ok so here are the rules:

  1. Leave a link to your page or post in the comments of this post.
  2. Reblog this post.  It helps you, it helps me, it helps everyone!
  3. Edit your reblog post and add tags.
  4. Feel free to leave your link multiple times!  It is okay to update your link for more exposure every day if you want.  It is up to you!

  5. Share this post on social media.  Many of my non-blogger friends love that I put the Meet n Greet on Facebook and Twitter because they find new blogs to follow.

See ya on Monday!!

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Sunday Musings: Being a Wife and Mother

So we finished worshipping God in church thanking Him for all his faithfulness for the past month being the first Sunday in April. It is always a thanksgiving day for us.

After the church service, my daughter had this idea that we should take her out to celebrate her birthday. Guess what? Her birthday is still some weeks to come in April but because celebrants for the month usually cut a cake and are prayed for she felt that her day starts today… Hehehe…

We all joked about it and laughed but she was serious. So we placated her promising to buy her snacks and drinks on the way home. All the while we were thinking of how much will still be spent in marking her 10th birthday…. So we played smart parents!!!

Guess where I am now? In the market trying to get stuffs for lunch. Now I wished I had followed my daughter’s wish to eat out. 

After this market stress… I am off to the kitchen. Oh… the joys and stress of “wifehood and motherhood”.

Happy Sunday.😀😀

Adebisi Adetunji (C)

Hmmm… This Story Touched me… It just might Save Your Marriage

MARRIED OR NOT, YOU SHOULD READ THIS .………..A friend posted on my whatsapp and I simply want to share it with you.

When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I’ve got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.

Suddenly I didn’t know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know crewhat I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly. She didn’t seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why? You know

I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn’t talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Jane. I didn’t love her anymore. I just pitied her!

With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company. She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Jane so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.

The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn’t have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Jane. When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again.

In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn’t want anything from me, but needed a month’s notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month’s time and she didn’t want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.

This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day. She requested that every day for the month’s duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.

I told Jane about my wife’s divorce conditions. . She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully.

My wife and I hadn’t had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mommy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don’t tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.

On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn’t looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.

On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me. On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn’t tell Jane about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.

She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily.

Suddenly it hit me… she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.

Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it’s time to carry mom out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.

But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn’t noticed that our life lacked intimacy. I drove to office…. jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind…I walked upstairs. Jane opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Jane, I do not want the divorce anymore.

She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Jane, I said, I won’t divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn’t value the details of our lives, not because we didn’t love each other anymore. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart. Jane seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away. At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I’ll carry you out every morning until death do us apart.

flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I run up stairs, only to find my wife in the bed -dead. My wife had been fighting CANCER for months and I was so busy with Jane to even notice. She knew that she would die soon and she wanted to save me from the whatever negative reaction from our son, in case we push through with the divorce.— At least, in the eyes of our son—- I’m a loving husband….

The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves.

So find time to be your spouse’s friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage!

Remember love is the richest of all treasures. Without it there is nothing; and with it there is everything. Love never perishes , even if the bones of a lover are ground fine like powder. Just as the perfume of sandalwood does not leave it, even if it is completely ground up, similarly the basis of love is the soul, and it is indestructible and therefore eternal. Beauty can be destroyed , but not love.

Adebisi Adetunji (C)

Dorathy’s Story – Promoting Women’s Health through Family Planning #getittogether

A friend of mine Dorathy (Not real name) has two boys. Often when we talked she admired my little girl and really desired to have a baby girl, someone she could dot on. A girl she could take to the salon to make her hair, fix all sorts of colorful ribbons and hair extension. We would often laugh about this.

Dorathy my friend soon got pregnant again and we were all very excited about this new baby but it would turn out to be a turbulent pregnancy. She was in and out of the hospital and almost lost her life. Dorathy had to undergo a Caesarean section. As soon as she was delivered of her baby Dorothy got a family planning method done. When I asked her if she still had plans to have more babies in the future she vehemently rejected the idea, saying that she wants to be well and alive to care for her children.

Every time I see my friend Dorathy she looks chicky, young, alive and beautiful! She has time to pursue her dreams and handle her business. Her boys are doing well too.

Family Planning helped my friend to handle the fear of getting pregnant again after an eventful pregnancy.
How Family Planning can help promote a woman’s health
• She can rest in between births. This allows her to recuperate properly before getting pregnant again.
• A woman/her family can choose to have babies when they are ready.
• Family planning gives a mother the time needed to care for and nurture her baby as she doesn’t have to face the challenge of been pregnant while still nursing a 3 -6months old baby. This can be emotionally and physically draining for her, her baby and the family.
• Family Planning is one sure way of saying “I have enough children”. This means that a woman can stop having children if she is satisfied with the number she has while still in her reproductive years.
• When a woman keeps having children with barely enough time in between births she cannot pursue her dreams and goals. With family planning, a woman can meaningfully contribute economically to her family and the society.

A healthy woman, a productive woman
A healthy woman, a happy woman
A healthy woman, a more relaxed and beautiful woman
Family Planning promotes women’s health and wellbeing.

Adebisi Adetunji(C)